Struggle and Crawl
by RinShade
Summary: Just when she thought things were getting better, Spencer faces a new nightmare. How will she face being taken from the people she loves? What will it take to beat the monster that took her? When she goes home, will she tell everyone what happened? How do you keep going when the worst thing has happened? What do you have to change inside to survive? Who do you have to become?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone! This is the first chapter of my new story. I'd like to start things off by thanking 4everliars for giving me the idea for this story. This story takes place a month after the end of season 2. I really hope you guys like it. So without further ado, here is my new story **_**Struggle and Crawl.**_** And as always, I don't own anything.**

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Chapter 1- regrets and promises

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Toby's POV

The warm air rushes into the open windows of my truck as I slowly make my way through the streets of Rosewood. My left hand grips the steering wheel loosely, while my right arm wraps gently around the slender body of my girlfriend. I glance down at Spencer as she sighs and rests her head against my chest.

It feels so good to have her next to me. Pretending not to love her was the hardest thing I have ever done. Now that Mona has been revealed as A, we can finally be together again. We've been making up for lost time this past month. We spend all our spare time together. That's what we'd been doing tonight before Spencer got a text from Aria.

"Sorry we had to end things early." She says. We had been on a date. I had taken Spencer to the grill for dinner, but Aria sent Spencer an SOS before we could even order.

"You don't have to apologize." I say. "Emily is more important than dinner." Spencer had called Aria after she got the text. Aria and Hanna said that they needed her at Emily's house. It's been a month since she found out that Maya was dead. Murdered. She hasn't been back to school, and she rarely leaves her house.

She has been doing a little better, but I guess tonight was a bad night, and she need Spencer and the girls there for support. It makes me feel guilty for being so happy with Spencer, while she's suffering. I wish she had gotten her happy ending like I did.

"I wish I could do something for her." She says. "I feel like I should know what to do to make things at least a little bit easier for her."

"You're doing everything you can Spencer. Being there for her when she needs you is all you can do." I say. Spencer kisses my shoulder.

"I don't deserve you." She says as she looks up at me with her chocolate brown eyes. "You're always so kind and understanding. You're too good to be with someone like me."

"You're right." I say. "You don't deserve me, you deserve someone so much better." She leans away from me and frowns.

"I'm being serious Toby." She says.

"So am I." I say. "You're beautiful, smart, loving, thoughtful, driven, and just down right sexy. You're way too good for anyone, including me." I reach up and brush some hair away from her blushing face. She rests her body back against me and kisses my cheek.

"I love you." She whispers. I pull into her driveway and park my truck. I turn to her and kiss her lips slowly.

"I love you too." I mumble against her mouth. She smiles.

"I better go." She says. "I told Aria I wouldn't take long."

"Are you going straight over to Emily's house?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'm just going to run up to my room and grab a few things before I drive over there." She says. "I might end up staying the night."

"Do you want me to come in and help you?" I ask.

"No, it's okay. You should go home and get some rest, you have to get up early for work." She says.

"Okay." I say. "Are you still coming over after school tomorrow?"

"Yes." She says.

"You promise?" I ask. Spencer laughs at my mildly desperate plead.

"I promise." She says. She kisses me quickly hops out of the truck. "I'll call you later."

I watch her as she disappears into her house. For a split second, my heart stops as a feeling of dread washes over me. This isn't the first time I felt this. For the past month, every time I watch Spencer leave, I worry that I'll never see her again. The weeks I spent separated from Spencer have made me paranoid, and I have an overwhelming need to rush in the house after her.

I know I'm being an idiot. Spencer fine. Mona is in lockdown. A is gone. There's no more danger. I shake my head and sigh. I start up my truck and pull out of the Hastings driveway. _Spencer's fine_, I tell myself as I drive away. _ You'll see her tomorrow. Everything's fine. _

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_**Two hours later **_

Aria's POV

I can feel Emily's body shake as she cries silently. Hanna and I are curled up next to her on her bed. No one has spoken in over an hour. There really wasn't anything left to say. Emily said it was enough just to have us here.

My eyes drift to the clock on Emily's nightstand. It's ten past nine. Where the hell was Spencer? I called her over two hours ago. I think about calling her again, but I don't want to ruin the quiet. When we first got to Emily's house, she was having some sort of panic attack, and was sobbing and screaming. So I didn't want to break the quiet calm atmosphere that took us so long to achieve.

The silence was broken anyway a few moments later when there was a knock at the door. I turn my head to the door, expecting to see Spencer, but it's not her. It's Emily's mom. She's on the phone with someone.

"It's….just….just wait and I'll see." Says Mrs. Fields. She covers the phone with her hand and takes it away from her face.

"Sorry if I woke you girls up, but Mrs. Hastings is on the phone and she wants to know if Spencer is here." She says.

"No, she not here. Why?" says Hanna. Mrs. Fields ignores Hanna's question and presses the phone back to her ear.

"I'm sorry Veronica, she's not here." she says. I can hear Spencer's mom talk in a panicked tone. "I….hold on don't…..don't panic, I'll ask them." Mrs. Fields pull the phone back again and she turns to us.

"Do you know where she is?" she asks us.

"I talked to her a couple of hours ago." I say. "She said she was on her way over hear, but she never showed." The color in Mrs. Fields face drains away, and it makes me feel sick.

"Mom, what's wrong?" asks Emily. Mrs. Fields looks at Emily with a heartbreaking expression. It's the look a mother gives her daughter when she doesn't want to hurt her anymore then she already is.

"I don't know." She says, and then goes back to the phone.

"Veronica. They said they don't know where Spencer is. Aria said she was going to come over here, but that was hours ago." A pain filled cry echoes from the phone. "Veronica please. I….this doesn't mean anything. I'm sure she's fine. Veronica? Hello?" Mrs. Fields looks down at phone and frowns.

"Mom, what happened? Did something happen to Spencer?" says Emily, her voice quivers.

"I really don't know honey." She says.

"That was Spencer's mom right? She seemed really freaked out about something." Says Hanna. "What was wrong?"

"She's just a little worried. She's having trouble getting in touch with Spencer." She says, and struggles not to look worried.

"It's more than that." I say. "Mrs. Hastings doesn't just break down because she can't get in touch with Spencer after a few hours." Mrs. Fields hesitates. She's not sure she should tell us.

"Please mom. I need to know." Says Emily. "We're going to find out anyway. If it's something bad, I'd rather hear it from you." Mrs. Fields shoulders sag.

"I…I don't know much. Veronica was hysterical. But apparently, when Veronica got home tonight, the door to the house was wide open. When she walked in the house, I guess there was some over turned furniture. Spencer's car was in the driveway, so she rushed up to Spencer's room to see if she was okay. And…when she got to Spencer's room she…she found." Mrs. Fields pauses and looks down.

"What did she find?" asks Hanna. Mrs. Fields looks up at us with tears in her eyes.

"She…. She found blood. A lot of blood, on the floor of Spencer's room." She says. We all gasp. Before we can say anything, the sound of sirens fill our ears and red and blue lights illuminate the dimly lit room as police cars race pass the house and head to the Hastings home.

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Spencer's POV

I have so many regrets. I'm practically drowning in them. For me, a new day guarantees a new regret. I regret not being a better person. I regret wasting so much time on trying to be perfect. I regret no taking time to enjoy life more. I regret not being a better friend. And right now, more than anything, I regret the fact that I won't be able to keep the promise I made to Toby. I'm not going to see him tomorrow. I might never see him again. But god, I wish I could.

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_**One week later**_

Toby's POV

Spencer has been missing for seven days now. Aria called me today with news. The police sent the blood in Spencer's room off for testing. The blood belongs to Spencer. The police aren't looking for Spencer anymore, they're looking for a body. They almost positive that if they find her, she won't be alive.

I don't know if I agree with them. I don't know what I believe. I don't even know what to feel. I'm numb.

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**So what do you think? Did you like it? Would you like me to continue? PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW and tell me what you think.**

**-Rin Shade **


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow! I'm so amazed by the response I got. Thank you all so much for the awesome reviews. I hope you like this chapter. I don't own anything.**

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_Toby's POV_

_Spencer has been missing for seven days now. Aria called me today with news. The police sent the blood in Spencer's room off for testing. The blood belongs to Spencer. The police aren't looking for Spencer anymore, they're looking for a body. They're almost positive that if they find her, she won't be alive._

_I don't know if I agree with them. I don't know what I believe. I don't even know what to feel. I'm numb._

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Chapter 2- Nothing

Spencer's POV

When I wake up, the first thing I notice is the pounding in my head that's in perfect time with my heartbeat. For a while, that constant thumping is the only thing I can focus on. It's the only thing that seems real. But soon, other things start to stand out.

I'm sitting in a chair, instead of lying in my bed. My ragged breath doesn't travel far from my mouth, like there's something covering my face. I slowly open my eyes, and I'm met with darkness. Only small specks of light manage to shine through the thick material shrouding my head.

I move to take the bag off my face, but my hands won't move. I pull as hard as I can, but my arms don't move from the ties that bind them firmly to my sides. That's when I really start to panic. I think about screaming for help, but I'm afraid. I don't want to alert the person, or people, that did this to me.

What the hell is going on? Where am I? None of this makes sense. The last thing I remember, I was with Toby at the grill. How did I go from being on a date with Toby, to this? I must be missing something. I try to clear the fog from my brain and focus.

I was at the grill with Toby, then….then I got a text. It was Aria. She needed me to come help Emily. But what happened after that? Did Toby take me to Emily's house? No…no that's not right. He took me home. He drove me home. I said goodbye, and I went into the house. And then….and then…..oh god. I feel a strange ache in my shoulder, and everything suddenly comes rushing back to me….

_I walk into the house and set my purse down on the kitchen counter. I start to go to the stairs, when I hear something. It sounds like voices. A chill runs down my spine. Something isn't right. I freeze and strain to listen. I hear it again, it's coming from the study, and it's definitely someone talking. But who could it be? Mom and dad aren't home from work yet, and Melissa is in Philly. _

_I start to inch toward the study doors. My gut keeps telling me to turn around and run back to Toby, but I can't seem to stop myself from moving closer. I finally reach the closed study door. I press my ear up to the door and listen._

"_Why are we doing this?" says a deep voice._

"_Because I'm nowhere near done messing with these bitches." Says a higher voice._

"_Everyone thinks A is gone." says deep voice. "We can just walk away from all this without having to face any consequences. Why don't we just quit while we're ahead?"_

"_We won't come out ahead until those four liars really know the meaning of the word suffer. I won't be happy until I watch them burn." Says higher voice. _

"_I don't want to do this anymore" says deep voice._

"_You don't have a choice." Says a third voice. "You lost that choice when you killed that girl."_

"_I didn't kill her, you did." Says the deep voice._

"_But whose prints will they find on the murder weapon if I let it turn up." Says high voice. "Now finish installing the damn camera before she gets back from screwing around with that carpenter." I hear a sigh come from the deep voiced person. _

_I back away from the door. My entire body is shaking. This is bad. I want to see who's in that room, but I don't want to know what those people will do to me if they catch me. I need to be smart about this for once. I need to get out of here and call the police._

_I try to be quiet as I continue to move away from the study. I'm about ten feet away from the door when the worst thing happens. My phone rings. I quickly pull it from my pocket and turn it off, but the damage is already done. The study door flies open and three hooded figures step out. _

_No one moves for a moment. We just stand there, sizing each other up. I can't make out their faces from here. And I'm certainly not moving in for a closer look. I take a small step backwards instead, and that step seem to break the trance._

_The three figures lunge for me, just as I turn and start running. I move as fast as I can, but it's not fast enough. I barely manage to reach the living when something solid slams into me. I crash into a table and knock over a lamp as my body smashes face first to the floor. I try to roll over, but someone is straddling my back and pressing my face to the ground._

"_How much did you hear?" says the high voice. I don't say anything._

"_Now what do we do?" says the person holding me down. "We can't just let her go?"_

"_Do we…do we kill her?" asks deep voice. A sob escapes my mouth and I start franticly look for a way out. I spot a sharp piece of glass from the broken lamp near my right hand. I strain to reach it._

"_No you idiot. It's too soon have another body turn up." Says high voice. "We can't have the police crawling all over the place again. And we can't put the blame on Garrett again since he's in jail."_

"_Then what? We can't exactly keep her with us, now can we?" says deep voice. My fingers brush against the shard of glass, the three are too distracted with plotting my demise to notice me warping my hand around the makeshift weapon._

"_No, we can't keep her." Says the third voice. "But I know a guy who can." That's when I strike. I lash out at an awkward angle, but I still manage to make contact with the person sitting on me. I don't know where I hit them, but it gets the job done. The person screams and lets go of me. I wiggle out from underneath them and stumble to my feet. The other two are blocking all the exits, so I only have one option left. The stairs._

_I hit the stairs at full speed. I run to my room out of habit. I throw the door closed and lock it. Something slams into my door less than a second later. I reach into my pocket for my phone, but it's not there. Damn, I must have dropped it. _

_I look quickly around my room for something that could help me as they continue to beat on my door. But there's nothing. I don't have time. I don't have a plan. I have nothing._

_My door busts open. I try to run, but there's nowhere to go. An arm wraps around my neck and pulls my back against their body._

"_That was very stupid." The person whispers. I can't tell which one it is, but I'm positive it's a man. I'm suddenly throw to the ground again, except this time I'm face up. He straddles me again, pinning my arms to my sides. I still can't see his face, maybe because I'm too distracted by the large knife he just pulled out of his coat. I start to scream, but his free hand quickly covers my mouth. _

"_Let's see how you like it." He say. He slowly presses the knife into my left shoulder. The pain is explosive as the knife tears through my thin shirt and pushes into my skin. My back arches and I scream into his hand as he slowly pushes the knife deeper into my shoulder. It feels like this goes on for hours. My vision starts to blur, I think I might pass out from the pain. But finally, the knife travels as deep as it can._

_Then, in one swift motion, the man stands and pulls the knife from my shoulder. A small cry leaves my lips, but I don't scream. I can't. It's taking all my energy just to stay awake. I can hardly focus on anything. I feel blood pouring out of the hole in my shoulder. I would love nothing more than to let the darkness crawling along the edge of my vision take me. But I can't do that. I have to keep fighting. I roll onto my stomach and try to move away from my attackers. _

"_How cute. She still thinks she can get away." One of them say._

"_Just knock her out so we can get her out of here." Says another. Something big hits me in the head. I don't have time to think about the pain as I lose the fight to stay awake…_

I scream as the memory finally falls into place. I scream and pull at the ropes holding me down, but it doesn't do any good. I gasp for air and I try to keep myself from hyperventilating. Panicking won't do me any good. I need to think. Think think think.

I hear something just ahead of me. I look in that direction, even though I can't see through the hood. I hear footsteps. I hold my breath.

"Thanks for the gift." Says a voice that wasn't from that night. "What can I do with her?"

"Do whatever you want." Says the voice of the man that attacked me with the knife. "Just make her life a living hell. And when she finally begs for death. Kill her."

I start sobbing. I can't help it.

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**Seven months later**

Aria's POV

At first, out of habit, we kept waiting for A to text us, to tell us where Spencer was. But A, Mona, was in Radley. So the texts never came. After the first month, the police seemed to give up, and so did Spencer's grief stricken family. But we didn't. We spent the last mouth of school and all of summer looking for Spencer. We hunted for clues, we hung posters, we did everything we could think of. But nothing turned up. No one called with information. No one knew anything.

After three months of searching, Toby stopped coming to help. He and Emily had a huge fight about him giving up. He said he would never stop looking, but he couldn't do it with us anymore. He said being around us reminded him too much of Spencer. He said it was too painful.

After Spencer was missing four months, things went from bad to worse. Hanna, Emily, and I got together on the last day of summer. We didn't feel like partying, but that didn't stop us from drinking. When I woke up that night, Emily was gone. Hanna and I panicked. First Ali, then Spencer, now Emily.

But then we found her. At the foot of Ali's dug up, empty, grave with a shovel in her hands. We hid the shovel and got Emily back home. We pretended that we didn't know anything about the grave robbing the next day. We thought we got away with it, but then someone figured out the truth. A. A was back. Haunting us with texts and threats. But they never said anything about Spencer.

Being back at school without spencer was awful. It felt like the weight of school, family, the return of A, and everything else was too much for just the three of us to bare. I wasn't sure how much longer we could go on without Spencer.

Thinking about all of this makes new tears fall from my eyes. I huddle down deeper into my bed and try to shut out the world.

There's a soft knock at my door. I groan. They must take that as an invitation, because the door opens and someone walks in.

"Aria. Are you awake?" my dad asks. I pull my covers back and look at him.

"I am now." I say.

"Are you going to school?" he asks.

"I don't think so." I say as I wipe tears of my face.

"Aria, I know you've been having a hard time, but you can't afford to miss that many more days. This has to stop." He says.

"I'll stop tomorrow." I say.

"If you keep this up, you'll have to repeat your senior year. Do you really want to be stuck in high school another year?" he asks.

"No." I whisper.

"Okay." He says. "So get up and get ready before you're late." He leans down and kisses the top of my head. "I'll go ahead and give Mike a ride to early morning practice on my way to work. I'll see you tonight." He says, then leaves. I sit there and listen as he and mike get in the car and pull out of the driveway. I sigh and roll out of bed. My dad's right. Staying home won't make anything better. If Spencer were here, she'd be yelling at me to get my crap together.

Spencer, where are you? My eyes drift to the calendar. School started close to three months ago. Which means it's been over seven months since Spencer went missing. My body wants so badly to just give up hope. But my mind won't let me, because if I don't have hope, then I have nothing.

I quickly wipe away a few more stray tears and walk to my closet. I put on a pair of jean and a plan long sleeve shirt. I didn't feel like worrying about fashion today. My mind wonders as I slowly get ready, and before I know it, it's time to go.

I grab my bag head down stairs. I open the front door and step outside. I go to take a step forward but I freeze at the sight before me. There's a person, a girl, standing at the base of the porch steps, with her back turned towards me.

She's wearing a loose fitting grey sweatshirt, and as far as I can tell, that's all she's wearing. The sweatshirt comes down to about mid-thigh. The sweatshirt and her boney bare legs are covered in dirt, grime, and blood. The hood on her sweatshirt is down. Her brown hair is barely long enough to brush the top of her shoulders.

My heart is pounding, but I don't know why. I don't feel like I'm in any sort of danger. I feel like I'm missing the punch line of a really bad joke.

"H…hello? Can…can I help you." I say, but my voice cracks. The girl doesn't react. She just stands there. I start to say something else when she speaks.

"There was no one at my house and the doors were locked, so I came here. Sorry for the surprise." She say. My breath catches in my throat. That voice. It can't be. Can it? Then she turns around. I gasp.

"Spencer."

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**What did you guys think? Who were the three people in Spencer's house? Who was the four person they left her with? PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW and tell me what you think.**

**-Rin Shade **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey everyone! Thanks for all the great reviews! I hope you all like this new chapter. It was really hard to wright for some reason, and I'm not sure if it turned out the way I wanted it to. Anyway, hope you enjoy. I don't own anything.**

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_My heart is pounding, but I don't know why. I don't feel like I'm in any sort of danger. I feel like I'm missing the punch line of a really bad joke._

"_H…hello? Can…can I help you." I say, but my voice cracks. The girl doesn't react. She just stands there. I start to say something else when she speaks._

"_There was no one at my house and the doors were locked, so I came here. Sorry for the surprise." She say. My breath catches in my throat. That voice. It can't be. Can it? Then she turns around. I gasp._

"_Spencer." _

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Chapter 3 – Save Our Souls

Aria's POV

I don't give myself time to think, or second guess. I don't ask questions, or pause to wonder if this is real. I don't hesitate at all. I throw my bag to the ground, and I half stumble half run down the porch steps. I slam into Spencer and throw my arms around her. She barely manages to keep her balance. I start sobbing loudly as I bury my face into Spencer's shoulder. At first, she just stands there. She doesn't react while I fall apart. But then, she slowly lifts her arms and hugs me back.

"You're here. You're really here Spencer. You're back." I say, as if to reassure myself that this is all reality and not my desperately overactive imagination.

"Yeah. It's really me. I'm back." She whispers. In that moment, my brains decides to start working again and the full weight of the situation dawns on me. Spencer is back. She's here. After seven months, here she is. Everything catches up to me. I gasp and pull away from Spencer

"What happened? Where were you? How…."I try to bombard her with more questions, but she cuts me off.

"Aria, please. I know you have a lot of questions, but can….can we maybe talk inside?" she asks. I look at her, I mean really look at her, for the first time.

My eyes widen as I take in Spencer's appearance. The blood sodden grey hoody she's wearing is much too big for her. It hangs loosely around her neck, and I can see the only thing she's wearing underneath it is a black bra. She looks painfully skinny and weak. She bare legs tremble, and I'm not sure if it's from the autumn chill or her ill state.

Her once long shiny brown hair is dull, and hangs just below her chin. Her cheeks are hollow looking. Most of her face is covered with bits of dirt and blood, but the skin I can see looks sickly and pale. My eyes focus in on the left side of her face. Beneath the blood, I see a long jagged scar. It starts at the inner corner of her left eye and moves diagonally down her cheek, over her jaw, down the side of her neck, and then cuts sharply to the right and trails over her collarbone. It continues its path down the center of her chest and disappears beneath her shirt. New tears fill my eyes.

"Spencer." I whisper. "What happened to you? You're….the blood….is it yours? Are you hurt?"

"Don't worry Aria, I… I'm fine." She says.

"You don't look fine. You look…..we should call someone." I say. She looks at me and smiles.

"Everything's going to be okay Aria. I promise." Says Spencer. "But right now, I would really like to get inside, before someone sees me standing out here half naked." She smiles again. How can she smile when she looks like she just walked away from a car wreck?

"O…okay. Let's get you inside. You're probably freezing." I say, my voice shaky. Spencer takes a step forward and stumbles. I grab her before she can fall and help her up the stairs and into the house. I close the door behind us, and we slowly make are way to the couch. I help her sit down and then take a seat next to her.

I stare at her. I don't really know what else to do. I'm in shock. I've never felt so overwhelmed. My body is shaking with emotion. This all feels so surreal. I've imagined Spencer coming home so many times. But never like this.

"It's just how I remember it." Says Spencer. She's leaning back into the couch, her head resting comfortable. "I was afraid things would be different. I'm glad nothing changed too much."

"Spencer, we should call someone. You look like you need to go to the hospital. Your parents….oh my god, your parents! And….and Toby, and everyone! They need to know you're back. That you're okay." I say. I jump up and start to pace in front of her as I try and decide what I should do first. "What should we do?" I ask. But Spencer isn't listening to me. Her eyes are closed, and for a moment I think she might be sleeping. Then she speaks.

"How long?" she asks.

"How long what?" I ask, confused by the question and why she isn't as panicked as I am.

"How long have I been gone?" she asks. She opens her eyes and stares at me. I stop pacing. Now I'm really confused. How can she not know how long it's been?

"About….about seven months." I whisper. She frowns and shakes her head.

"Only seven. I could have sworn it was longer." She says. I sit back down beside her.

"Spencer. What happened?" I ask. She sits up straight and her eyes darken. I brace myself for what she might tell me.

"It's better if you don't know." She says.

"But…"

"Aria." she says. She closes her eyes and sighs. "I think…. I think I should go to the hospital now." I watch in horror as her body goes limp. She falls off the couch and onto the ground in an unconscious heap.

"Spencer!" I shout. I grab her shoulders and roll her on her back. She's so light, it hardly takes any effort at all. I then reach a shaky hand up to her neck and check for her pulse. To my great relief, she has one.

"Damn it! I'm so stupid" I yell at myself. I should have called for help as soon as I saw Spencer. I was just so shell shocked.

I take my phone from my pocket and quickly dial 911.

"911, what's your emergency?" says a friendly voice.

"My friend….she….she needs help. She just passed out." I say.

"Is she injured?" says the operator. I look down at Spencer. I've never seen someone look so horrible. I can't even describe it. She looks like she's on deaths door. I start sobbing again.

"Yes. Yes she's injured." I cry.

"Can you tell me what kind of injury it is?" they ask.

"No." I say.

"Can you tell me what happened?"

"No….no just send someone, please." I sob. "And the police. You should probably call the police." I hang up the phone before they can ask any more questions I can't answer. I put my phone away and focus on Spencer. She groans and her face twists into a painful expression. I sit on the floor beside her and pull her up into my lap. She seems to relax a little.

"It's okay Spencer. I got you." I say as I try to comfort her. Suddenly, there's a sharp knock at the door. I jump.

"Rosewood PD." Shouts someone. I've never been so glad to have the cops knocking at my door.

"In here!" I shout. A man in a uniform open the front door and step inside. He stops mid stride when his eyes land on Spencer and me.

"What happened?" he asks.

"This is Spencer Hastings." I say. His eyes widen.

"The girl that went missing?" he asks.

"Yes. She…she showed up here a few minutes ago like this. Please help her." I say. The officer stares for a few more seconds before shaking himself out of his stupor and motioning to someone behind him. Two paramedics with a stretcher walk in and kneel next to Spencer.

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Time starts to rush by in a blur. In no time at all, the medics have Spencer strapped to the stretcher and are loading her up into the ambulance. I make them let me ride with her. I don't take no for an answer. Things get even more chaotic when we arrive at the hospital.

A group of doctors and nurses crowd around Spencer and start shouting about this and that and other things I don't understand. I try to follow but someone holds me back. I cry and scream and plead for them to let me go, as I watch Spencer get wheeled away by the hospital staff.

"It's okay." Says the person holding me. "They'll take care of her, I promise. You just need to let them do their job." I stop struggling. I look back at the person holding me. It's the police officer from the house. His eyes are kind, and full of understanding. "Are you calm now?" he asks me.

"Yes." I mumble. He lets go of me.

"The doctors will take great care of her." He says again.

"Is she going to be okay." I ask him. He smiles sadly at me.

"We'll just have to wait and see." He says. "And while we're waiting, maybe you can tell me what happened this morning." I watch him take out a pad of paper and a pen.

"Can I call my parents first?" I ask.

"Of course." He says. I take out my cell phone and walk down the hall a few yards so the cop can't hear me. I have no intention of calling my parents. At least not yet. First, I send out a quick text to Emily and Hanna.

_**SOS! Come to hospital ASAP. – Aria.**_

I know I should call and tell them what's going on, but I would rather tell them everything in person. And besides, they aren't the only people I need to call. The police will contact Spencer's parents, so that leaves me with one more person to tell. Toby. I know he won't respond to just a text. I'll have to call him.

I scroll through my contacts and find the number I'm looking for. The phone rings three, four, five times, then it goes to voice mail. I hang up and call again, but get the same result. I hang up and call three more time before someone finally answers.

"What do you want Aria." says Toby.

"God Toby. It's a good thing I wasn't trying to call you about something important." I yell sarcastically.

"I'm hanging up." Says Toby.

"No wait! Toby it's….it's Spencer." I say.

"Spencer? What happened? Did you find out something new?" he asks desperately.

"Toby. She's alive. She's here. In Rosewood. We're at the hospital." I say.

"She's here? She's alive? Wait! Did you say hospital? Is she okay?" his voice shakes with emotion. I wish I could answer his questions, but I can't. I don't know if she's okay. She sure didn't look okay, but I'm not going to tell Toby that. I can't even begin to describe the state Spencer was in.

"Toby you…she….you just need to get down." I say.

"Please Aria. Tell me she's going to be okay." He pleads.

"I'm sorry Toby. I just don't know." I say. He's silent for a few seconds. I think I hear him crying.

"Okay. Okay, I'll be there as fast as I can." He says, then hangs up.

* * *

I just get done with giving the police my statement when Emily and Hanna burst into the waiting room.

"Hanna, Emily. Over here." I say. They rush up to me.

"Aria! We heard the police were at you house. What….Oh my god! Did you get hurt?" Hanna says at lightning speed. She and Emily are gapping at me with fear laced expressions.

"I'm okay. I'm fine." I say.

"Then whose blood is that?" asks Emily.

"Blood? What bl….." I look down at myself. There's blood smeared across the front of my shirt and on my arms and hands. It must be Spencer's blood. I didn't even realize until now. "It….it's not my blood." I say.

"Then whose is it?" asks Hanna.

"Spencer's." I say.

"Did you says Spencer?" asks Hanna.

"Yes. She's here in the hospital." I say.

"Spencer's here?! She's back? Are….are you sure?" asks Emily.

"Of course I'm sure!" I snap. I instantly regret it when I look at the tear filled eyes of my best friends. "I'm sorry." I whisper.

"It's okay Aria." says Hanna. "Just tell us what happened." I let myself fall into one of the hard plastic hospital chairs, and I bury my face in my hands.

"I was awful." I cry. "I…walked outside this morning and there she was. Right in my front yard."

"Was she…..is she alive?" asks Emily.

"Yes. She's alive. But she looked terrible." I sob. "She was covered in blood and mud and she….. I can't even descried it. Something bad happened to her."

"Did she tell you anything?" asks Emily.

"No, but she didn't have to." I say. Hanna sits down next to me and wraps an arm around me.

"But she's alive, right?" says Hanna. I nod my head. "Then that's what we have to focus on. Spencer's home and she's alive. That's all that matters right now. We can handle anything as long as she's alive."

"Hanna's Right. Everything's is going to be okay." Says Emily. The three of us sit there and hold each other. We stay like that for a while, but are forced apart when we hear shouting coming from just outside the waiting room. Something akin to a roar echoes throughout the halls of the hospital. It's the unmistakable call of a desperate grief ridden boyfriend. Toby.

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**What did you think? PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW and tell me your thoughts.**

**-Rin Shade **


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for the great reviews! I'm so glad you guys are liking this story! I'll try to keep it updated twice a week so you don't have to wait too long. I don't own anything.**

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"_Hanna's Right. Everything's is going to be okay." Says Emily. The three of us sit there and hold each other. We stay like that for a while, but are forced apart when we hear shouting coming from just outside the waiting room. Something akin to a roar echoes throughout the halls of the hospital. It's the unmistakable call of a desperate grief ridden boyfriend. Toby._

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Chapter 4 – All That Matters

Toby's POV

When Spencer first went missing, I couldn't sleep. I couldn't be still. If I wasn't actively out looking for her, I was thinking of ways to find her. And in the rare moments when I did sleep, I would dream of her. Some of the dreams were good. I would dream she was home with me, and she would laugh at me for worrying so much. Her eyes would sparkle as she smiled and told me she loved me. But some of those dreams were nightmares.

Instead of her laughter, I would hear her screams. She would reach out to me and beg me to help her. She would cry and plead and ask why I wasn't saving her. I would wake up in a cold sweat, and my mind would start running scenarios of different horrible things that might have happened to Spencer.

The days, weeks, and months were mostly a blur of nonstop searching and praying. The only time I would ever pause would be at sunrise. When the sun would rise, I would stop and watch as the new day came alive. And I would think, _today. Today will be different. Today will be the day I find her. The day Spencer comes home. _But it was never so. The sun would rise, and the sun would set, but she never came home. I never found her.

But I didn't give up. The others may have thought I gave up, but I didn't. Spencer's not the kind of person you give up on. She's the kind of person you spend forever looking for. The kind of person you go to war for. I would let the world burn if it meant saving her. And I would die before I gave up hope.

So I started today like every other day. I sat in my loft after another sleepless night, I watched the sun rise, and I prayed that today would be the day. When my phone rang and I saw that it was Aria, I ignored the call. I figured she was just trying to check up on me again. I never imagined that she had the answer to my prayer.

Spencer is alive. She's home. I was floored by the news. I barely managed to hold it together on my way to the hospital. Aria didn't give me much information about Spencer's condition. Only that she was alive. And right know the only thing between me and seeing the love of my life is this stupid, good for nothing, piece of shit doctor.

"I'm only going to ask one more time." I growl. "Where is Spencer Hastings? If you don't tell me I swear to god I'll…."

"TOBY!" someone shouts. I spin around and come face to face with Emily. I haven't seen her since our big fight a few months ago. I was awful to her. She was my best friend and I wasn't there for her when she needed me the most. The sight of her replaces my rage with shame and guilt.

"You need to calm down Toby, before you get yourself thrown out." Says Emily.

"But I have to see her." I say, my voice dripping with desperation.

"And you will, when the doctors say you can." Says Emily. "I'm sure they'll tell us the moment we can see her. Right?" she asks the doctor I was screaming at just moments before.

"Of course we will. Her parents will be arriving soon, and once we talk to them we'll be able to sort a lot of things out." Says the doctor.

"See." Says Emily. "Now why don't you come and sit down with us while we wait." It's then that I realize that Hanna and Aria are standing next to Emily. I nod my head and follow the girls back into the waiting room.

I sit down next to Emily. My hands curl into fists as I try to keep calm. Emily gently places her hand over mine and loosens my fingers. I look up at her. She's looking straight ahead. Her eyes are brimming with tears. This must be so hard for her, and yet she's the one comforting me. After I pushed her out of my life. I don't deserve her comfort.

"Emily." I whisper. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." She says.

"No it isn't." I say. She sighs.

"You're right. It isn't, but I understand. You did what you had to do." She say. We all stay silent until I can't take it anymore. I have to have answers.

"What exactly happened?" I ask to no one in particular.

"I…. I really don't know. I opened my front door and there she was." Says Aria.

"Was she….did she look okay?" I ask. Aria bites her lip and looks down.

"No. Not really." She whispers. I notice something on Aria's clothes. My heart starts pounding. Blood. How did I not see that earlier?

"Is that Spencer's blood." I ask.

"I think so." Says Aria. "Everything happened so fast."

"Do you think she'll be okay?" I ask.

"I don't know!" she shouts, tears streaming down her face. I'm about to apologize for pushing her too far when the doors to the waiting room fly open. We all watch as Mr. and Mrs. Hastings stumble into the waiting room. The usually put together couple look like they're teetering on the edge of insanity.

"Girls, Toby, have you heard anything?" asks Mrs. Hastings as she rushes up to us.

"No, they haven't told us anything." Says Hanna.

"Aria, the police said you found her? How? Is she okay?" asks Mr. Hastings. Aria looks like she's been asked those questions more than a thousand times today. Before she can break down I jump up and intervene. It's the least I can do.

"Spencer just showed up on Aria's door step this morning, the police came soon after that so she doesn't really know much." I say.

"Is she hurt? She is isn't she? Is that her blood?" Mrs. Hastings bombards Aria with questions, and the rest of us are unable to defend her.

"She….She looked bad. Really bad." Says Aria. "I'm sorry." Before they have time to process this, a doctor walks in the room.

"Are you two Spencer's parents?" the doctor asks.

"Yes! Yes we are. Is Spencer okay?" Asks Mr. Hastings. The doctor glances behind Spencer's parents and looks at the girls and me as we stand there eager for news.

"Perhaps it would be better if we speak privately." Says the doctor.

"No! I need to know, we need to know." I yell. I turn to Spencer's parents. "Please." I beg them.

"They can stay." Says Mr. Hastings. A grim look crosses the doctors' face.

"Mr. and Mrs. Hastings. Believe me when I say that it is in Spencer's best interest that we speak privately. After we speak you can use you own discretion about what you tell her friends." Says the doctor. The Hastings faces pale.

"Why don't we step out into the hallway." Says Mr. Hastings. The three of them start to walk away.

"Wait!" I shout. "Just….please tell me. Is she alive?" the doctor pauses and frowns.

"Yes. She's alive." He says.

"So she's going to be okay?" asks Hanna. The doctor seems to choose his next words carefully.

"She'll survive the injuries she received." He says. That statement both clams and disturbs me, but I'm not sure why.

We watch in silence as the doctor leads them into the hallway. We stare at them through the glass window of the waiting room door. Their expressions change as the doctor speaks. Mr. Hastings starts to cry, and Mrs. Hastings crumbles against her husband. I don't know how long the doctor speaks to them, or how long they stand out in the hallway trying to pull themselves together. It seems like hours, but it can't be, because I swear I hold my breath the entire time. When the pair finally come back into the waiting room, I let myself breathe. I need to be calm.

"What did he say?" asks Aria, her voice heavy with tears after witnessing Spencer's parents' breakdown. Mrs. Hastings hands shake and Mr. Hastings clears his throat.

"They said we'll be able to see her in about an hour." Says Mr. Hastings.

"What's wrong with her?" asks Hanna.

"She has a lot of scrapes and bruises. She had some deep cuts on her body and needed several stitches. They're giving her antibiotics to clear up any infection." He says. "Mostly she's just weak. Exhausted, dehydrated, and extremely malnourished. They want to keep her here for a couple of days to help her get her strength back. She's going to be fine." Mr. Hastings voice cracks towards the end.

"What aren't you telling us?" I ask. "As bad as all that is, you wouldn't be this devastated if that was all that was wrong. What's so bad that you think we can't know?"

"I've told you what you need to know. I suggest you leave it be for now." He say as he puts a protective arm around his wife. I'm about to argue when Emily puts a hand on my shoulder. The look on her face tells me that this isn't the time. She's right.

My shoulders sag in defeat and I let her lead me to a chair. One hour. Just one more hour and I can see her. I'm dying for more information on how she is, but I keep quiet. Spencer's alive. That's all that matters right now.

* * *

Spencer's POV

I keep my eyes closed long after I wake up. It's a habit I developed over the past few months. I like to catalog my surroundings before I let him…..anyone know I'm awake.

I'm confused by my environment at the moment. It doesn't seem right. The smells and sounds aren't what I'm used to. But the thing that catches me off guard the most is the soft, warm bed beneath me.

It takes me longer than I'd like to admit to realize I'm in a hospital. But how did I end up here? Oh yeah. That's right. I'm back in Rosewood. I went to Aria's house. I must have passed out. I'll have to apologize about that.

A small smile spreads over my face. I'm back. I'm home. I did it.

I slowly open my eyes and take in the sight of the bright, crisp, clean hospital room. I never thought I'd be so happy to be in the hospital, but it's the best sight I've seen in a long time. Besides seeing Aria of course.

I almost didn't go to her house. After I found my house locked and my parents gone, I almost just went to the police. But the overwhelming need to see a familiar face won out. Aria lives closer to me than anyone else I know, so I went there. And I'm glad I did.

I didn't truly realize I was back until she hugged me. I had almost cried. I never thought I'd see my tiny friend again. She looked different. Her clothing and makeup were so plain. Nothing like the overly vibrant girl I remember.

I wonder what else has changed since I was….away. When I was gone, thinking about my friends and family was the only thing that kept me going sometimes. And Toby. My Toby. I thought about him so much it hurt. I couldn't keep him from my mind, even when it was painful to think of good things. I wonder if he's here. Seven months is a long time.

He never said it, but I know he only stayed in Rosewood for me. Maybe he moved away. I hope he didn't, even though it might be for the best. I'm not the girl he loves. Not anymore. It wouldn't be fair to ask him to love what I've become.

I shake my head. I can't think like that right now. I'm back. I'm alive. That's all that matters. For now.

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**Hope you all liked the chapter. PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW. Thanks for reading.**

**-Rin Shade **


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you for all the great reviews! You guys are, as always, completely amazing! I don't own anything.**

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_He never said it, but I know he only stayed in Rosewood for me. Maybe he moved away. I hope he didn't, even though it might be for the best. I'm not the girl he loves. Not anymore. It wouldn't be fair to ask him to love what I've become._

_I shake my head. I can't think like that right now. I'm back. I'm alive. That's all that matters. For now._

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Chapter 5 – Scars

Spencer's POV

The sound of the door opening pulls me from my thoughts. A tall middle aged man with slightly greying hair walks in. He's clad in a white coat, so I assume he's a doctor. His eyes stay locked on the clipboard in his hands and he mumbles to himself.

"Hello." I say. His head snaps up. His eyes are wide with surprise.

"Oh! Ms. Hastings. I'm sorry. I didn't expect you to be awake yet." He says in a rush.

"That's okay." I say. He clears his throat and forces a smile onto his face.

"I'm Dr. Brant." He say. He approaches me slowly, like he's approaching a wounded animal. This confuses me for a second, but then I realize that since he's my doctor he probably got a good look at my body. So he can probably guess the kind of things I've been through. I'm sure he's worried about how I might react. "How are you feeling?"

"Good." I say. He raises an eyebrow. I not lying. I haven't felt this good I months. The fact that I'm home and safe leaves me no room to complain.

"Do you remember what happened." He asks.

"Yes." I say. He waits for me to elaborate, but I don't. He must see that I'm not really in the sharing mood and he moves on to another question.

"Do you feel weak?" he asks.

"Yes." I say. He nods his head.

"Are you in any pain?" he asks.

"Not really." I say.

"You needed some stiches on your stomach and back. How do those feel?" he asks. He watches my every move. Evaluating both my body and mind. It's annoying.

"They're pulling a little, but it's okay." I say. He writes something down on his clipboard, then he takes out his stethoscope.

"Can you sit up for a moment." He says. I push myself up with shaky arms. I try to hold still but my body trembles in protest. I already long to lay back down on the bed. The doctor goes to lift the stethoscope up to my chest, but he pauses. "Would you feel more comfortable if I had a nurse come and do this?" he asks. He's under the impression that I won't feel comfortable with him touching me because he's a man.

"No. I'm fine." I say. It doesn't matter if the doctor is a man. I don't care if anyone touches me, as long as it's not _him. _And I know I don't have to worry about_ him_ ever again.

Dr. Brant trails the cold metal over my chest and back, then writes a few more notes on his clipboard.

"You seem to be doing okay. It will take some time to recover fully though." He says.

"I know." I say as I ease myself back down on the bed. "I was prepared for that." the doctor gives me another calculating look, than he sighs.

"You also need to have a psychological exam done before you can be released." He says.

"I understand." I say.

"The police are also waiting to talk to you. You'll need to give them a statement since there's clear evidence of…."

"I know!" I snap. "I don't need you to tell me about evidence. I was there." The doctor doesn't seem surprised by my outburst, which kind of ticks me off. I take a few deep breaths and I push the anger out of my mind.

"Yes, well, all that can wait." He says. "Do you feel like having visitors?" he asks.

"Who is it?" I ask. A bit of anticipation swirls in my stomach.

"You mother and father." He says. I frown. I want to see them of course. But to be honest, there are others that are higher on my list.

"Anyone else?" I ask hopefully.

"The girl who called the ambulance is here, along with a few friends." He says. Aria's here and a few other friends. I wonder if that includes Toby.

"Yes. I'd like to see them all." I say.

"Alright." He says. "I'll go let them know." And with that he leaves. I suddenly feel nervous. I've finally reached my goal. I've lived to see the people I care about again. All that I did to get to this moment, all that I endured. It was all worth it.

My hand unconsciously reaches up to the left side of my face. My fingers start trailing over the scar that's there. It's about the width of the tip of my index finger. The slightly purple raised skin runs unevenly all the way down to the base of my stomach. But my fingers only move along the part on my face. It's an old scar. One of the first ones I was given.

It's not pretty. But it doesn't really bother me. I may have bothered me when I first got it, if I didn't have bigger things to worry about at the time. But it certainly doesn't bother me now. To me, scars have come to mean survival. If you live long enough for an injury to become a scar, it means you didn't die. Scars might not be pretty to look at, but they're a good thing.

I'm not worried about my friends or family seeing my scars. I know my friends. They won't care about the scar. Their love for me is more than skin deep, so to speak. And I know without a doubt that Toby won't care about the way I look. He's too perfect to let something like a scar change his views of a person. But I am worried about what my blatantly broken body might signify to them.

Will they see my wreaked body and assume I also have a wreaked mind? Will they treat me the same? Should they treat me the same? I don't see myself as broken, but I have changed. I'm nothing like the girl that I was seven months ago. That girl died so that I could live. I just hope that the people I love think it was a worthy sacrifice.

There's a soft knock at the door. This is it. I take a deep breath.

"Come in." I say. My voice sound weak, instead of strong like I'd hope. The door slowly opens. My mom and dad walk in. My heart seizes. I missed them more than I thought I did. They pause in the door way for a second. They both have tears streaming down their faces. They stare at me. My mom stifles a sob with her hand.

"Mom." I whisper. And with that single word, she runs to me. She gathers me in her arms and I hug her back.

"My baby. Oh god. My baby." She sobs and kisses the top of my head. I feel another set of arms wrap around me. I peek out of my mothers' grasp and see that my dad has managed to squeeze in next to my mom.

"I missed you so much." He says.

"I missed you too. You have no idea." I say. They pull away and look at me. My mom cups my face in her hands.

"I never thought I see you again." She cries. "I…. I just….. I can't believe this. It's a dream come true." I smile at her. I look over at me dad. I can see the questions swirling in his eyes, but he doesn't ask. No doubt the doctor told my parents the damage done to me. They know the result, but now they probably want to know the story.

"Spencer." Says a voice from behind my parents. I look pass my dad. It's Aria. She's wearing a set of blue hospital scrubs. I start to wonder why, but that train of thought disappears when I see Hanna and Emily come into the room behind her.

Seeing my friends again completely overwhelms me with happiness. They smother me with tears and hugs. This is my family. And their warmth comforts me in a way I didn't dare imagine until now.

But it's doesn't compare to the way I feel when the last person walks into the room. Toby. He looks different. He's slightly thinner, his hair is longer, and he has a scruffy looking beard. But there is no mistaking those piercing blue eyes. I feel tears fall down my face. The first tears I've cried since my return. My heart aches at the sight of those pain filled orbs. But there is more than pain in those eyes. There's love.

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Toby's POV

Waiting for the doctor to come and get us was excruciating. It nearly killed me. I swear, time stood still. When the doctor did finally came and give us the okay, he wouldn't let Aria see her until she changed out of her bloody clothes.

Emily asked me to wait with them while Aria changed into some scrubs. I didn't want to want, but I did. I watched as Mr. and Mrs. Hastings walked to Spencer's room while Aria changed in the bathroom. I wanted to chase after them. I almost did. But Emily had grab onto my hand and told me that they needed to see her first.

It felt like it took forever, but soon Aria emerged from the bathroom in the clean scrubs. She looked like a tiny nurse. The four of us quickly made our way to Spencer's room. It took everything I had not to run. When we finally arrive at her door, my heart is pounding. I can hear the muffled sobs of her parents.

Aria opens the door and steps in first. Hanna and Emily rush in after her. The three girls and her parents surround her with love. But me, I'm frozen. I stand like a statue and watch as Spencer hugs everyone back with a smile on her face.

I want to hug her. Kiss her. Love her. But all I can do is watch her. Spencer. Living, breathing, smiling. It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. _She's_ the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I see the pain and hurt she's hiding too, but mostly the beauty. And it takes my breath away.

When her eyes land on me, I can't stop myself from crying. Her mouth moves but no sound comes out. But I don't need sound to know that she said my name. My feet move on their own and I take her in my arms before I have time to think.

Her body feels light and frail as she leans against me. Her thin arms pull me close to her. She buries her face against my chest and cries.

"You're really here." She whispers against me. A small sob slips passed her lips.

"Of course I'm here." I say. She sighs and leans even deeper against me. She mumbles something. I can't be sure what she said, but I think she said _worth it._

We all spend the next few hours in Spencer's hospital room. None of us can bring ourselves to leave. Her parents hover over by the right side of her bed. Her mother can't stop touching her, like she needs constant reassurance that Spencer is really there. The girls have gathered around the foot of her bed and they let me sit next to her left side.

Spencer tries to stay awake at first, but she's exhausted and soon loses the fight and falls asleep. No one says a word while she sleeps. We're all mesmerized. Spencer's back. She's here right in front of us. It's clear everyone is happy. But we're also crushed. At least I am.

Spencer's in bad shape. She's extremely underweight. Her bones look sharp beneath her pale skin. The thin hospital gown she wears does little to cover her injured body. Scars litter all of her exposed skin. Her arms, chest, and neck have scars that look like slash marks. Some look more like burns. Some are old and faded to the point where you can hardly see them. Some have a unique look about them and I can't imagine what they're from. And of course, there's the one scar that's bigger than all the others. It runs down her face and vanishes beneath her clothes.

_What happened to you Spencer? _Something or someone hurt her. No. They did more than hurt her. They stole something from her. Apart of her is missing. And something tells me she might never get it back. And when I looked into her eyes, I saw a ghost. It was a haunted look. Like she was seeing something no one else could see.

When the doctor came in and told us that visiting hours were over, I didn't want to go. I wanted to stay. I wanted to make Spencer better. I wanted to help her. To fix her. I know I couldn't do it in one evening, but I could at least start. And plus, I wasn't ready to let Spencer out of my sight. The girls and I were in the middle of arguing with the doctor when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turn to see Spencer awake and looking at me with those gorgeous brown eyes.

"Go home Toby." Spencer says.

"I want to stay." I say. "I need to stay."

"You need rest. You look awful." She says.

"I don't think any of us are ready to leave you just yet." Says Hanna.

"I don't want you guys to go either, but you need sleep and so do I." she says.

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" asks Emily.

"Yeah." She says as she take ahold of her mothers' hand. "My parents will be with me."

"Of course we will." Says her mom.

"Okay. But we'll be back in the morning." Says Aria. The girls give Spencer one last teary eyed hug goodbye and then they reluctantly leave.

"You to Toby. I'll be fine." She says. "I'll be right here in the morning. And I'll feel better knowing you got some rest." I nod my head. I know I have to leave, but just the thought makes me sick.

"Okay Spence." I say. I lean down and kiss the top of her head. "I'll be back first thing in the morning." This won't be hard since I plan on sleeping in my truck in the hospital parking lot. At least that way I'll be somewhat close.

"I know you will." She says.

"I love you Spencer." I say. She gives me a sad smile.

"I love you too Toby." She says. I start to make my way out when she stops me.

"Toby." She calls. I turn back and look at her.

"Yes." I say.

"Thank you." She says. I frown.

"For what?" I ask.

"For saving me."

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**Hope you guys liked that. Thanks so much for reading. PLEASE REVIEW!**

**-Rin Shade **


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks so much for all the reviews! You guys are great. And thanks to Fluffy Tazzy for leaving me the best review. I kind of got off track with this chapter. I wanted it to be more about Spencer and Toby, but it ended up being about Toby and Emily. I hope you guys like it. I don't own anything.**

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"_Toby." She calls. I turn back and look at her._

"_Yes." I say._

"_Thank you." She says. I frown._

"_For what?" I ask._

"_For saving me." _

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Chapter 6 – Selfish or Selfless

Toby's POV

A loud noise wakes me from a restless sleep. I sit up to quickly and I bash my head against the window of my truck. I swear loudly and rub my head as I try to shield my eyes against the rising sun. It's finally morning. I thought it would never come. I didn't think I would really get any sleep sitting in the cab of my truck. I guess I was more tired than I thought.

_Bang, bang, bang._

I jump as the same noise that woke me up starts up again right next to my head. I turn and look out the window I just hit my head against. Emily stares back at me as she bangs her fist against the glass. She's wearing an angry looking frown. I drag my hands over my face and open the door. Emily steps aside as I climb out of the truck.

"You stayed here all night." she says.

"Yes." I answer her, even though she clearly wasn't asking. Her frown deepens, then in one swift movement, she pulls back her arm and punches me in the chest as hard as she can. It doesn't hurt, but it does take me by surprise. Emily is the least violent person I know. This isn't like her.

"You idiot!" she yells. "I can't believe you! Do you ever think about anyone besides you? You're just so damn selfish."

"Selfish? How am I selfish?" I ask.

"Do you really think camping out in a parking lot helps Spencer? It's only going to worry her more because you're going to walk in there looking like a half dead drifter." She shouts. "And how do you think it makes me feel to drive up here and find you passed out in your truck. I have enough to worry about. I don't need to worry about you too, especially when all I want to do is hate you!" Emily starts sobbing.

So that's what this is really about. She's angry at me, and she should be. She had always been there for me when I needed her, and then I paid her back by abandoning her when she needed me the most. She had just lost Maya, and then Spencer went missing. She was hanging by a thread and I let her drop. She's right. I'm selfish.

I look up at her. She holds her face in her hands as she cries. My heart breaks. She probably doesn't want me to touch her but I can't help it. Not with her crying in front of me like this. I walk up and pull her into a hug. She lets me. I hold her as she lets out the pain I caused her through her tears.

"You left me. You left all of us." She says once she's calm enough to speak.

"I know." I whisper against the top of her head.

"I needed you." She says.

"I know you did." I say.

"Then why? Why did you leave?" she asks.

"I had to find her. I had to look for Spencer." I say.

"We were all looking for Spencer. You didn't have to do it on your own." She says.

"Yes I did. I just couldn't stay. Everything I saw when I was with you girls reminded me of Spencer. It was too much." I say. She pushes away from me and looks up at me with tear filled eyes.

"That's bullshit Toby, and you know it is." Says Emily. "You thought about Spencer every second of every day. We had nothing to do with it. In fact, if we did really remind you of Spencer you wouldn't have left, because you wanted to be reminded of her. You were afraid of forgetting her. You told me you were a week before you walk out of my life."

"I'm sorry Emily. I….. I had to leave. I can't explain it." I say.

"Try." She says. I rake my fingers through my hair and groan in frustration.

"Emily. I can't." I say.

"JUST TELL ME!" she screams. "Please just tell me why you were so desperate to get away from me!"

"You think I wanted to leave?! You think I enjoyed being all by myself again." I yell.

"If you didn't want to be by yourself than why did you go?" she asks.

"Because of you! You three girls. It was your fault!" I say. Emily's eyes go wide.

"What do you mean?" she asks.

"You were getting in my way!" I shout. "You girls were always getting in the way. I was supposed to be focused on finding Spencer, but all I could focus on was you and Aria and Hanna. Every time I thought I found I lead I had to worry about you three and dragging you closer to danger. I knew that something bad happened to Spencer. And I knew that if I ever got close to finding her I would be putting you three in the same danger that Spencer was already in."

I take a deep breath and look up and the morning sky. I drag my hand across my mouth and then I start speaking again.

"The closer we got to finding Spencer the closer you girls were to getting hurt or worse." I say more calmly then I have been speaking. "I just couldn't. I couldn't risk you're life. I couldn't let what happened to Spencer happen to you three. You girls are Spencer's family. I and wasn't going to bring Spencer back to a family with missing members. So I pushed you away. And yes, it was awful and selfish, but I didn't care. You girls were safe, and I could focus all my energy on bring Spencer home."

Emily stares at me for the longest time. New tears stream down her face. She does nothing to hold them back. All the anger she had seems to drain away, and she's left looking ragged and tired. And then she surprises me again by pulling me towards her and hugging me.

"You really are an idiot Toby." She whispers against me. "You can't protect everyone. And you certainly can't do it by leaving the people you love."

"I'm so sorry for hurting you, but it was for the best." I say.

"You're wrong. I hardly survived losing three people I loved. I would rather die than lose another." Says Emily. "I wanted to die when you pushed me away."

"Oh god Emily. I …..I never meant to make you feel that way. I …..I just wanted you safe. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I say and hug her back.

"I know." She says. She slowly pulls away and looks down. "It just still hurts."

"I understand." I say. "You don't have to forgive me. I just want you to know that I care about you."

"I care about you too." She says. "Just promise me you won't leave again. No matter what."

"I won't. I promise." I say. She smiles sadly and wipes away her tears.

"Good." She says. "Well we better go. Visiting hours started fifteen minutes ago. Aria and Hanna should be here soon."

We walk through the parking lot and head towards the hospital. Emily keeps glancing over at me.

"You really do look like crap." She says. "Why the hell did you sleep in your car?"

"I couldn't bring myself to drive away." I say. "Especially after what Spencer said to me before I left."

"What did she say?" Emily asks.

"She thanked me for saving her." I say. "I don't know why. I didn't save her. I wish I did, but I didn't."

"What do you think she meant?" she asks.

"I have no idea." I say.

"You didn't ask her?" she says.

"I didn't get a chance. She fell asleep." I say as we walk into the hospital.

"Are you going to ask her today?" she asks.

"Maybe. But she might not remember saying it. She seemed a little out of it." I say. "But it doesn't really matter. I didn't save her and that's that."

"But it sounds like Spencer thinks otherwise." Says Emily.

"We'll see." I say.

* * *

Emily forces me to at least wash my face in the bathroom before we see Spencer. I begrudgingly agree. I walk into one of the hospitals' dimly lit bathrooms. I look at myself in the mirror. Emily's right, I do look like crap. My clothes look slept in. I really need a shave. And I probably don't smell that great. But there's nothing I can do about that right now. I splash some warm water on my face. It feels good.

My thoughts drift back to Spencer as I dry my face off. I had spent most of the night think about what might have happened. But something tells me that none of the horrifying things I thought of come even close to the truth. I hope I get some answers today. I need to know who hurt Spencer. I need to know the names of the people I have to kill.

I walk out of the bathroom and find Emily waiting for me, along with Hanna and Aria. They both look as tired and worried as I do.

"Look who showed up." Says Emily.

"Hey. Aria. Hanna." I say.

"How you holding up?" asks Aria.

"Probably about as good as you guys." I say.

"So not to good then." Says Hanna.

"No. Not really." I say.

"Have you seen the news?" asks Aria.

"No, why?" I ask.

"It's all about Spencer. Every channel." she says. "Someone must have leaked it to the press."

"What are they saying?" I ask.

"Nothing much." Says Emily. "Nothing we don't know. Just talking about Spencer, how she disappeared for seven months then showed up out of the blue yesterday."

"Do they know she's in the hospital?" I ask.

"Yeah, but they don't know why? Just that she's stable." Says Hanna.

"Great. The last thing Spencer needs is a bunch of reporters trying to get at her." I say.

"I know. They keep talking about her like they know her. It's really pissing me off." says Aria.

"Have any reporters bothered you guys yet?" I ask. Everyone but Aria says no.

"They were waiting at my house when I got home last night." says Aria. "They must have found out that I was the one that call for help. My parents were freaking out too. They kept me up until one in the morning asking questions."

"That's why you look so bad." Says Hanna.

"Thanks Hanna. You always know what say to make me feel better." Says Aria sarcastically. We fall into awkward silence. That is until Emily asks the one question that everyone has been too nervous to ask out loud.

"What do you think happened to her?" she whispers. "All those scars. And she looks so sickly."

"Don't forget that the doctor and her parents are clearly hiding something from us." Says Aria.

"She was acting weird too. She was so calm. Spencer is never calm. She's the definition of not calm." Says Hanna.

"Yeah. You think she would be freaking out or something." Says Aria. "All she wanted to talk about was what we've been up to. She acted like she came home from a vacation, not…..something else."

"Look. I don't know what happened. But I know were not going to get answers just standing here." I say. "Spencer is the only one that can answers our questions."

"So what. We just walk up and ask her 'Hey Spence, how you'd get all those awful scar and where have you been for the past few months.'" Says Hanna. "Somehow I don't think that's going to go over that well."

"Hanna's right." Says Emily. "If she wanted to tell us she would've said something last night."

"Maybe she didn't want to say anything in front of her parents." I say.

"Maybe she didn't want to say anything at all." Says Aria. "When she first show up…..I asked her what happened and…and she said it was better that I didn't know."

"Why would she say that?" asks Emily.

"I don't know. But I don't think we should push her right now." Says Aria. "I think for now we should just be there for her." I sigh.

"Aria is right." I say. "We're making this about us. It doesn't matter what we want to know. We need to think about Spencer and what she needs."

"Well than what the hell are we waiting for!" says Hanna and she start heading down the hallway.

"Hanna. What are you doing?" asks Emily.

"I'm going to Spencer's room." She says over her shoulder.

"You're going the wrong way." Says Emily. Hanna stops.

"Oh." She says and turns around. We all smile. It's a bit of much needed humor in a terrible situation.

We make are way down the halls of the hospital, not as a group, but as a family. And I silently swear I will never leave them again. I watch as each of the girls mentally prepare themselves to be strong for their hurting sister. They do a good job at making their faces seem relaxed. But those calm expressions shatter when we hear a heart stopping scream coming from Spencer's room.

* * *

**I really hope you guys liked this chapter. I'm sorry it wasn't very long. The next one will be longer. A special thanks to Greg Laswell and his song Comes and Goes in Waves. I listened to it on a loop while i wrote this. It reminds me of Toby. Great song, you guys should check it out. **

**Also, I'm going to add a few more characters into the mix. Is there anyone you guys want to see in the upcoming chapters? Tell me what you think. PLEASE REVIEW. **

**-Rin Shade **


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks for the great reviews! This chapter is going to have the first of many flashbacks. The flashbacks will reveal what happened to Spencer while she was gone. They will be a bit graphic. If that kind of thing bothers you, then don't read the parts in italics. I hope you guys like it. **

* * *

_We make are way down the halls of the hospital, not as a group, but as a family. And I silently swear I will never leave them again. I watch as each of the girls mentally prepare themselves to be strong for their hurting sister. They do a good job at making their faces seem relaxed. But those calm expressions shatter when we hear a heart stopping scream coming from Spencer's room._

* * *

Chapter 7 – Scream For Me

Toby's POV

We run the rest of the way to Spencer's room. I reach the door and throw it open. Inside, Spencer is thrashing around in her bed. Her eyes are shut tightly and her face is twisted with pain. Her parents are standing over her, calling her name, but she doesn't seem to hear them.

"What's happening?" I ask.

"I don't know." Says Mrs. Hastings. "She was sleeping just fine a moment ago." I notice a few spots of blood on the front of her hospital gown.

"Her stiches." I say.

"I'll get a doctor." Says Hanna as she runs back out into the hallway. Spencer whimpers as she struggles against the nightmare playing out in her mind.

"We tried to wake her up, but that only made it worse." Says Mr. Hastings. I walk closer to Spencer. I reach out to touch her, to comfort her, but Mr. Hastings grabs my arm before I can.

"Don't touch her. You'll only make it worse. Trust me." he says. I pull out of his grasp.

"If we let her keep moving she'll rip more of her stitches." I say. Right then, Hanna returns with the doctor. His eyes quickly take in the situation and then he jumps into action. He calls for a nurse to bring him some sedative, then he turns to me.

"Help me hold her down." He say.

I don't waste another second. I reach out and rest my hands on Spencer's shoulders. But as soon as I touch her, she throws open her mouth and screams.

* * *

Spencer's POV

_I hear something just ahead of me. I look in that direction, even though I can't see through the hood. I hear footsteps. I hold my breath._

"_Thanks for the gift." Says a voice that wasn't from that night. "What can I do with her?"_

"_Do whatever you want." Says the voice of the man that attacked me with the knife. "Just make her life a living hell. And when she finally begs for death. Kill her." _

_I start sobbing. I can't help it. They hear me._

"_Looks like she's awake." Says one of the men. "How about I introduce you to Ms. Hastings."_

"_I thought you didn't want her to see your face." Says the other._

"_It doesn't matter now. It's not like she'll live to tell anyone." I hear someone walk up to me. They stop in front of me. "Time to see your new home Spencer." he says. Suddenly, the bag is torn from my head._

_I'm in a dimly lit room. There's windows, but they're boarded over. There's a man standing in the doorway in front of me, but the bad lighting keeps me from seeing his face. But that doesn't matter right now. I'm much more concerned about the man standing over me. The man who stabbed me. A man I'm all too familiar with. The one and only Detective Wilden. _

"_Hey Spencer. Surprised?" he says. I should be terrified. I'm god knows where, I've been stabbed, abducted, and tied to a chair by a psychotic police officer. I should be terrified, but all I feel in this moment is anger._

"_Not as surprised as I should be." I say. _

"_Is that so." He say._

"_You're not that subtle." I say._

"_I guess I'll have to work on that." he says._

"_So how long have you been working for –A?" I ask._

"_Do you ever stop?" he asks. "You're all tied up and you're still digging for the truth."_

"_What have I got to lose?" I say._

"_You're something else." He says_

"_I'll take that as a complement." I say. "So why are you working for –A." Wilden laughs._

"_You think you're so smart Spencer. And I guess you are, but you have no idea what's going on. I've watched you. That mind of yours in constant overdrive, trying to figure things out. And you came close a few time, but it just wasn't close enough. " He say. "You know, I was angry that you came home early and found us in your house. Angry that you forced me to take you out of the equation. But maybe it was for the best. You probably would've figured it out eventually, so it's best to take care of you now."_

"_I'm not the only one you need to worry about." I say. My voice shakes a little as my fear starts to creep back up my spine._

"_You mean your friends? I doubt I need to worry about them. You were the brains for your little group Spencer. The only one capable of uncovering the truth." Says Wilden. He leans in close to my face. "Without you, your friends don't stand a chance. They're going to drowned, and I'm going to be the one to do it." _

"_Don't you dare touch them." I say through clenched teeth. The fear I was feeling for myself leaves me again when he threatens my friends._

"_Why not? You think you can stop me?" he says with a smirk._

"_I think anyone with half a brain could stop you Wilden. You're nothing but pathetic little boy with a badge who needs to bully teenage girls so he can feel all grown up." I say. I know my words are a mistake as soon as they leave my mouth. Wilden's expression darkness and anger comes off of him in waves._

"_A pathetic little boy. Is that what you think of me?" he says. He swings his fist and hits me in the face. The force of the blow tips the chair over. My breath rushes out of me when my back hits the floor. I struggle to breathe as Wilden kneels down next to me. _

"_Do you want to know what I think of you? I think your nothing but a lying little bitch with a pretty face." He says. "And do you want to know the best way to silence a pretty face?" he takes out knife and holds it up to me. "You make it ugly."_

_Wilden brings the knife closer to my face. I try to move away, but I'm still tied to the chair. Wilden holds my head down as he drives the knife into my cheek. _

_I scream._

_I scream and struggle but he doesn't stop. I feel him hold me down tighter. I feel blood pour from my body as he drags the knife down my face. Down my neck. My skin splits open. I feel like I'm being cut in half._

_I keep screaming._

_The knife cuts through my skin and clothes as Wilden pulls it down my chest._

_I scream._

_The pain is too much. I feel it everywhere. In every corner of my mind. In every inch of my body. I can't take it. And as the blade trails down my stomach, I fall into blackness._

_But I don't stop screaming._

_My mind still screams as I fall unconscious. The sound of my own agony crushing every other thought. I think I might be dying. And I'm okay with that, if it means the screams would stop._

"_Spencer" a voice echoes around my screams._

"_Spencer. Please wake up." It says. Toby. It's Toby's voice. He sounds so close. My pain lessens._

"It's me Spencer. You're safe. Open your eyes." _He says. My screams disappear. I feel familiar hands on my shoulders. Not Wilden's hand. Toby's hands. My mind starts to clear. I start to wake up from my memories._

* * *

Toby's POV

"It's me Spencer. You're safe. Open your eyes." I say. Spencer's thrashing starts to stop just as the nurse returns with the sedative, but the doctor doesn't give it to her. He waits to see if she's really calming down on her own.

"That's it beautiful. Wake up." I say. Her body stills completely and her breathing changes. I can tell she's awake, but she keeps her eyes closed. Like she's afraid to open them. I let go of her shoulders. I smooth her hair back and hold her hand. "It's okay Spencer. It's safe. I promise." She slowly opens her eyes. She quickly scans the room before letting her eyes land on me.

"What happened?" she asks.

"You were having a nightmare." I say. "You were screaming."

"Oh. I…. I'm sorry." She says.

"You have nothing to be sorry about sweetie." Says Mrs. Hastings. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine mom." Says Spencer. "Sorry to worry you. All of you."

"Didn't you mom just tell you that you have nothing to be sorry for." says Hanna. Spencer smiles. She tries to sit up, but winces and places a hand over her stomach.

"Looks like you tore some of your stitches." Says the doctor. "I'll have to take a look at those. Could everyone step out of the room please?"

No one argues with the doctor. I kiss the top of Spencer's head and follow the others out into the hallway. As we wait I think about the pained look that Spencer's face had before she woke up. I've never seen anything like it. And that scream. What was she dreaming about? What happened to her? What do I have to do to make her stop hurting? I wish I knew.

* * *

Spencer's POV

It's been a long day. Not a bad day, but a long one. The nightmare surprised me. I didn't have nightmares while I was gone. But I guess that's because I never really slept. The nightmare wasn't so bad though. I can deal with nightmares. I just wish everyone wasn't there to see it.

After my doctor stitched me back up, I was wheeled off for more tests. In between all the testing, my mom tried to get me to talk about what happened, but I gave her the run around. My dad had to keep leaving to deal with reporters that had snuck passed hospital security. And of course the girls and Toby never left my side. They never pushed me for answers. They only comforted me.

When all the tests were done, I thought I would finally get a moments peace. But then told me it was time for my psychiatric evaluation. I was pleasantly surprised to see that the psychiatrist they got was one I was familiar with. Dr. Sullivan.

She stunned me by saying that I didn't have to tell her what happened. She said she didn't need to know what happened to know if I was mentally stable. After an hour of standard questions she found me mentally fit to leave the hospital, but in need of weekly therapy. I could've told her that.

When the doctor allowed visitors back into my room, only one person came. And it wasn't someone I was expecting to see.

"Melissa?" I say when I notice her standing in the doorway. Her eyes are red, and her face wet from crying.

"I…. I came as soon heard." She says. She slowly moves into the room. "I almost didn't believe mom when she called me."

"That's understandable." I say. "Where's everyone else?"

"Mom and Dad are talking to Dr. Sullivan, and the girls made Toby go to the cafeteria with them so he could eat." She says. She glances at me then looks down at the ground.

She looks different. She's thinner. There's dark circles under her eyes, and her hair is limp. Her mannerisms are nervous and stink of guilt. Which makes sense. After all, she is on the –A team. The same team that put me through hell. Part of me wants to let her squirm in her guilty conscience, but another part wants to let her off the hook. She is just a pawn. As much a victim as me and the girls.

"Don't beat yourself up too much Melissa. I don't blame you." I say. Her eyes get wide. I smile. "What? Surprised I know the truth?"

"H….how?" she says.

"The last few months have been…informative." I say. She looks down in shame.

"What do you know?" she asks.

"I know that someone called –A started blackmailing you into helping harass me and my friends, making our lives a living hell." I say. "I know you don't know who –A is, but that you knew –A was responsible for my disappearance. I know they told you I was dead. And I know that you've been blaming yourself."

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry Spencer." she cries.

"It's okay." I say.

"How can you say that? How can you say it's okay after what I did?" she sobs.

"Because I know what it's like to be blackmailed by –A." I say.

"You know I left you some of those blackmail notes." Says Melissa.

"I know. It's fine." I say. "But if you want to make it up to me, you can answer a few questions."

"Anything." She says.

"Do you know who the other members of the –A team are?" I ask.

"Just Mona and Jenna." She says. "I know there was others but I don't know who they are."

"Did you work with Jenna a lot?" I asked.

"No. She just gave me orders some times. She put on this big show. Tried to get me to think she was –A. That she was the leader of the entire thing." she says.

"You didn't buy it?" I ask.

"Of course not. She didn't have the ability to pull it off." says Melissa.

"Are you still working with –A." I ask.

"-A will always have something against me, but I haven't been contacted since a day after you disappeared." She says. I already knew she wasn't with –A anymore, but it's nice to hear her say it.

"A day after? What did –A ask you to do?" I ask.

"Nothing, just left a note." She says.

"What did it say?" I ask.

"It….it said Spencer Hastings, rest in peace." She says.

"Well, lucky for me, -A is a liar." I say.

"You don't look lucky Spencer." she says. She studies my scarred face. "You look like you've been through hell."

"Honestly, I think hell would've been an upgrade." I say.

"This is all my fault. I shouldn't have been a coward. I should've done something to protect you. I….. I never wanted you to get hurt." she says.

"It's not your fault. And blaming yourself won't make things better." I say.

"I've never been a good sister to you." She says.

"Well I wasn't so great to you either." I say. "But I think we can put that behind us." She smiles sadly and holds onto my hand. She looks down at my hands and sees the bandages surrounding my wrists. New tears start to fall from her eyes.

"Oh god Spencer. What happened to you?" she asks.

"I was about to ask the same question." Says a sickening voice from the doorway. My head snaps in their direction. I narrow my eyes and curl my hands into fists. I force my breathing to stay normal and my heart to stay steady.

"Can I help you?" asks Melissa.

"I just need to ask Spencer here a few questions." He says.

"And you are?" says Melissa.

"I'm Detective Wilden."

* * *

**So what did you guys think? I hope this chapter wasn't too confusing. I kind of dumped a lot of info. PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW and tell me what you think.**

**-Rin Shade **


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys! Thanks for the great reviews. I'm updating this a lot earlier then I normally would, because I live in the Oklahoma Arkansas area and we're supposed to get some epic storms over the next few days. Nothing gets the creative juices flowing like the threat of massive tornados and super cells. Anyway, if it gets as bad as they say it's going to be, I might not be able to update for a while. Well, wish me luck, and enjoy the chapter. I don't own anything.**

* * *

"_I was about to ask the same question." Says a sickening voice from the doorway. My head snaps in their direction. I narrow my eyes and curl my hands into fists. I force my breathing to stay normal and my heart to stay steady._

"_Can I help you?" asks Melissa._

"_I just need to ask Spencer here a few questions." He says._

"_And you are?" says Melissa._

"_I'm Detective Wilden."_

* * *

Chapter 8 – Empty Threats

Spencer's POV

Wilden. Shit. I knew this confrontation was going to happen eventually, but I thought I would have more time to prepare. I didn't expect him to just come waltzing into my hospital room the day after I came home. I expected him to wait until I was alone and vulnerable. Instead he shows up when I'm surrounded by friends, family, and hospital staff. Cocky bastard.

I glance up at Melissa. I can tell by the look on her face that she has no clue that Wilden is anything other than a cop. She has no idea who he really is. Melissa might have been on the –A team, but they kept her in the dark. They probably didn't trust her because she was my sister.

Melissa looks at me. She immediately sees the new tension in my body. She clears her throat and stands up, putting herself between Wilden and me.

"I'm sorry Detective, but this isn't a good time." Says Melissa. "My sister doesn't feel like talking right now." Melissa thinks I'm afraid to talk to the cops about what happened. If only she knew what was really bothering me.

"I'm afraid she doesn't have a choice. Given the situation, it's important that we get her statement as soon as possible." He says with a smile. To anyone else, Wilden would look like a calm and confident officer of the law. But he can't fool me.

I can see right through his relaxed façade. I see the way he fights to keep his shoulders from bunching up. The fake smile does nothing to hide the tense pull of his jaw. He's pretending to have control of everything, when he knows he doesn't. He's scared.

The dread I was feeling about having to confront Wilden so soon fades away. Not only do I have the upper hand in this standoff, I also now have the comfort of knowing that Wilden is truly worried. And he should be.

"Spencer is only seventeen." Says Melissa, with the famous Hastings lawyer face. "You can't talk to her without her parents present."

"Do you know when they'll be back? Maybe I could wait?" he says.

"Maybe you could leave." Says Melissa.

"It's okay Melissa." I say. "After all, he's only here to help." I look him dead in the eye. I see a bit more fear shine through his mask. Nothing pleases me more than knowing I'm the cause of that fear.

"Are you sure?" asks Melissa. I smile at her.

"Yeah, it's fine." I say. "Why don't you go get mom and dad so the Detective can ask his questions?" Melissa looks and me than back to Wilden.

"Are you sure you'll be okay alone?" she asks.

"Of course. You'll only be gone a few minutes." I say. "I'm sure the Detective will keep me safe while you're gone." Melissa nods reluctantly.

"Okay. I'll go get them." She says. She starts for the door then stops and turns back to me. "I'll be right back."

"Don't worry Ms. Hastings." Says Wilden. "I'll take care of your sister." She smiles at him, totally missing the hidden meaning behind his words.

As soon as the door closes behind Melissa, Wilden lunges towards me. He grabs me by the neck, pulls out his gun, and presses the barrel against my forehead. I'm mildly surprised that this doesn't evoke fear in me. My heart remains slow and steady in my chest, my breaths are even. I lost my fear of death a long time ago. And I guess after all I've been through, I need more than a gun wielding lunatic to scare me.

"How the hell did you escape." He says through clinched teeth.

"I don't know. Maybe you should ask your friend." I say. "Or are you not able to get ahold of him. I wonder where he could be?"

"Don't fuck with me Spencer." he says.

"Why not?" I say.

"You're in no position to mouth off." he say.

"You're wrong. I'm in the perfect position." I say. "I have something a lot more powerful than a gun."

"What's that?" he scoffs.

"Knowledge." I say. "I know you never expected me to escape. You thought I would die in that hell hole." I lean towards him a bit. "But I have news for you Wilden. I didn't die. I'm back. And I know everything."

* * *

_Flashback-Spencer's POV_

_The knife cuts through my skin and clothes as Wilden pulls it down my chest._

_I scream. The pain is too much. I feel it everywhere. In every corner of my mind. In every inch of my body. I can't take it. And as the blade trails down my stomach, I fall into blackness. But even in sleep, I can't escape the pain. It continues to pulse through me._

_I try to wake up. I try to fight to the surface, but my body refuses to comply. I spend, what feels like hours, drifting in and out of reality. I think I hear someone talking to me, but I can't pin down the voice. The few time I manage to open my eyes, I see that I'm in a different room. I'm lying on the floor of what looks like a basement. There's no windows and the walls are made of cinderblocks. The lone light bulb does little to brighten the damp room._

_The next time I wake up, I notice something odd. I'm still on the ground, but someone has gently propped my head up on their lap. They run their fingers lazily through my hair. I force my eyes open, but my vision is a blur. I try to move, but the pain stops me. I moan and let my body relax back on the ground._

"_It's okay Spencer, just rest." Says a feminine voice. I work to make my eyes focus on the person holding me. I gasp as her face becomes clear._

"_Ali?" I whisper. "What are you doing here?"_

"_I should be asking you the same question." She says and brushes the hair out of my eyes. "Oh Spencer. Why are you always getting yourself into trouble?"_

"_You're dead." I say with a hoarse voice. "They found your body."_

"_Don't worry about that right now. You're hurt. You need to rest." Says Alison. She starts humming softly. I want to ask her more questions, but I'm so tired. I close my eyes and concentrate on Ali's humming. I let my mind drift and I fall asleep._

_I don't know how long I sleep, but when I wake up again, I'm fully alert. I'm still in pain, but it's no longer clouding my mind. I lie there for a moment and let myself think. That dream about Ali was so real. But I don't have time to think about a stupid dream. I need to think about the awful situation I'm in. What the hell am I going to do?_

_Tears start to pour from my eyes, burning my injured face as they fall. I slowly try to push myself up from the floor. But the pain and the weakness I feel has me falling to the floor again._

"_You're awake!" says someone behind me. It makes me jump. I prop myself up on my elbows and turn to look behind me. A small scream leaves my mouth when I see who it is._

"_Al….Alison?!" I say. She's sitting there against the wall. Alive and talking. Great. On top of everything else, I'm going insane. "This isn't possible." I whisper._

"_Actually, it is." She says. She walks over and kneels down in front of me. That's when I notice that she looks different. She doesn't look like the glamorous girl I remember her as. All she's wearing is a dirty white t-shirt. Her once shiny blond hair looks dull and limp. She's sickly thin. Her cheeks are sunken and her skin ashen. Her boney body is covered in bruises and scrapes._

"_This has to be a nightmare." I say._

"_Sorry, but this is completely real. Unfortunately." Says Ali._

"_But you died. You can't be here." I say._

"_I wish you were right Spencer." she says. She reaches out and touches my shoulder. Her cold, but living hand proving that she's real. "But that body they found wasn't me. I never died."_

"_But…..Then what happened?" I ask._

"_It's a long story." she says. I stare at her. My heart is pounding. Ali's alive. She's been alive all this time. But it's been two years. She's been gone two years! _

_I look at her appearance again. It's appalling. Her body is indescribably broken. But not just her body. Her spirit too. When I look into her eyes, I see no trace of the bright, devious, energetic girl I knew._

"_Ali….have….how long have you been here?" I ask. _

"_That depends. How long have I been gone?" she asks._

"_You don't know?" I ask._

"_When you spend every moment in a windowless room with no way to tell time, it's hard to keep track." She says numbly._

"_You…you disappeared two years ago." I whisper. A pained look flashes across her face._

"_Then I've been here two years." She says._

"_What is this place? What's going on?" I ask in a panicked voice. I struggle to sit up, but the stab wound on my shoulder and the bleeding gash that runs the length of half my body prevents me._

"_Here let me help you." Says Ali. She gently pulls me into a sitting position and leans me against the wall. The pain from moving make me feel sick. I glance down at my stomach and notice that I'm not wearing a shirt. All I have on is a pair of jeans and a simple black bra. The shirt I was wear is soaked in blood and wrapped about my middle._

"_Your shirt was already torn, so I used it to cover the worst of the cut." Says Ali. I peel back the shirt and look at the injury. I gasp and my hands start to shake. The cut is deep. I can see the shredded muscles and tissue beneath the torn skin. I break out in a cold sweat as I trail my fingers lightly over the length of the cut. I start at the base of my stomach and work my way up. I start to cry when I get to my face and feel the damage that's been done._

"_You really need stitches, but I doubt you'll get any." Says Ali. "Let's just hope it doesn't get infected."_

"_What do we do when Wilden comes back?" I ask shakily._

"_Wilden's not the one you need to worry about." She says. _

"_But he's working for –A." I say. _

"_Wilden isn't working for –A. He is –A. He's the leader of this entire thing." She say. _

"_Wilden is –A?" I say. "But why. We never did anything to him."_

"_It a long story." she says again. "But none of that matters. Not here."_

"_What do you mean?" I ask._

"_Wilden is crazy and violent, but he's nothing compared to the man he left us with." She says. A chill runs up my spine and dread coils in my stomach._

"_We…we need to find a way out of here." I say. Ali laughs bitterly._

"_There's no why out of here." She says. She points to the door on the other side off the small room. "That's the only why out. A steel door with ten different kinds of locks. If there was a way out of here, I would've left two year ago." I get quiet for a minute as I realize that I might not make it out of here. _

"_Why is this happening?" I ask. Alison looks at me with tears in her eyes._

"_It's all my fault." She whispers. "I was so stupid. I put all of you in danger. I've been try so hard to keep you, Aria, Hanna, and Emily safe. But now you're here. In the worse place possible. And it's all my fault. I'm so sorry Spencer."_

"_I don't understand Ali." I say. Ali sighs._

"_It doesn't matter Spencer." she says. _

"_Yes it does. It matters. Knowledge is power. When you know everything, you can't lose. So you have to tell me, because I'm not about to lose." I say. She looks at me. Her face lights up. She tries to hide it, but I see it. Hope._

"_You're right Spencer." she say. "I do need to tell you. I need to tell you everything."_

_-end_

* * *

"By the way. Alison sends her regards." I say.

"You little bitch." Says Wilden. He pushes the gun deep into my temple. "I'm going to blow your head off."

"No you won't." I say. "The moment you pull that trigger, all your dirty little secrets come out. Everyone will know you're a murderous psychopath."

"I've gotten away with killing a teenage girl before. I can do it again." he say.

"Then do it. Pull the trigger. Let's see you explain why you killed a defenseless and traumatized girl while she sat in her hospital bed. Of course you can always run after you kill me, but I doubt you'll make it out of the hospital." I say. His expression wavers.

"My parents will be back any second now Wilden." I say. "So stop screwing around. Either pull the damn trigger or get the gun out of my face." He grinds his teeth together and stares at me. Then he laughs and puts the gun back in its holster.

"You haven't won Spencer." he says. "The moment you leave this hospital, you're dead."

"Fine. Kill me." I say. "But you should know. The moment I stop breathing, is the moment your world explodes."

"What the hell are you talking about." He say.

"Do you really think I would come back without insuring the safety of me and my friends?" I say. His body tenses. "Like I said Wilden, I know everything. You're going to drowned Wilden. And I'm going to be the one to do it."

"You're lying." He says.

"Try me." I say. He hesitates.

"Okay. You got me. Tell everyone everything. Let the police arrest me." he says. "But I'll take you and those bitches down with me. I know secrets about the four of you and your families that will land you and everyone you love in jail for a long time." I knew he was going to threaten this. I smile. It means I've backed him into a corner. It means I'm one step ahead of him.

"I think this is what they call a stalemate." I say. "In the end it's your choice Wilden. You leave me and my friends alone forever and we all get to keep our secrets. Or we can all go to jail. So, what will it be?"

Wilden is shaking with rage. We both know what he's going to choose.

"You bitch." He says. Translation, option one please.

"Good choice. Now everyone wins." I say. The room door suddenly opens and my parents enter, along with the girls, Melissa, and Toby. Wilden wipes the anger from his face and puts on a fake smile. I know the deal we made won't last long. Wilden will be searching for a way around it, and so will I. I'm not going to let anyone I care about go to jail, but I will die before I let him get away with what he has done.

* * *

**Wilden is **_**the**_** –A! Alison wasn't really dead! What else could possibly happen? And who is the person that Wilden left Ali and Spencer with? Anyone who guess right gets 1000 points. PLEASE REVIEW!**

**-Rin Shade **


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you all so much for the great reviews. No one guessed who the mystery man was (because I'm awesome). I guess you'll have to wait and see. This chapter refers to some graphic topics. Don't say I didn't warn you. I don't own anything. **

* * *

"_Good choice. Now everyone wins." I say. The room door suddenly opens and my parents enter, along with the girls, Melissa, and Toby. Wilden wipes the anger from his face and puts on a fake smile. I know the deal we made won't last long. Wilden will be searching for a way around it, and so will I. I'm not going to let anyone I care about go to jail, but I will die before I let him get away with what he has done._

* * *

Chapter 9 – And the Truth Will Crush You

Spencer's POV

The room is crowded. It was cramped when it was just my parents, Toby, and the girls. But Melissa and Wilden seem to push it over the top. After all, hospital rooms aren't known for being notoriously big. But everyone seems hell bent on being in this room.

I know from past experiences that the girls and Toby don't trust Wilden, or any cop for that matter. I can see their distrust in their glares. I wonder what they would do if they knew the truth? Toby wouldn't hesitate to kill him, and the girls might help him.

As for my parents, they turn into lawyers as soon as they enter the room. Their faces and posture would make one think that they just walked into a courtroom.

"You have no right to be here without speaking to us first." Says my mom.

"I'm very sorry Mrs. Hastings. I'm just eager to solve this." Says Wilden. His face looks honest and apologetic. His acting skills are excellent.

"I don't care how eager you are, I won't let you harass my daughter." Says my dad.

"Look, I know we don't have a great history. And I know because of that, you see me as the enemy. But I promise you that my only agenda here is to help Spencer." says Wilden in the most sincere tone I ever heard. "All I want to do is catch the monster that hurt your daughter. I know you want the same thing. And me interviewing Spencer is the only way we both get what we want. So please, let me help."

I watch my parents slowly relax and let their guard down. Damn he's good.

"Do you really need to talk to her right now?" asks my mom. I see a shadow of a smile on Wildens face. He's beyond please with himself. He just loves manipulating my parents while I watch.

"The sooner the better. We can get on with our investigation, and get out of your hair." he says. His eyes dart over to me. I get a sick feeling in my stomach. He's up to something. But what? He can't do anything here, not without revealing that he's –A.

He and I are engaged in a fragile battle. One false step from either of us could be hazardous to both of us. But he's angry at me. Angry at me for getting the upper hand against him. He's hungry to cause me pain. But how is he planning to do it? All I can do is wait for his move.

"Are you okay with this Spencer?" asks my mom. I could say no. I could have them make Wilden leave. But I would rather get this over with now. I don't want to give him any more time to plan.

"Yeah, it's fine." I say.

"Alright." Says my dad. He turns to the girls and Toby. "Why don't you four wait out in the hall? It's a little crowded in here."

"That's not necessary." Says Wilden. "In fact, I would like them to stay. I might need to ask them a few questions in order to get an accurate timeline."

Why would Wilden want them in here? He doesn't need a timeline. There's no point. Not unless… oh no. He wouldn't.

"I think I would rather give my statement with just my parents present." I say. Wilden is planning on telling my friends the one thing I don't want them to know. I never wanted them to know. It will only cause them pain.

"Why?" asks Toby. He's sitting beside me. His blue eyes hold nothing but kindness.

"I just… I." I don't know what to tell him. I can't think of a lie. So that leaves me with the truth. "I don't want you to hear what happened."

"It's okay Spencer. I'm here for you. We all are." Says Toby.

"Toby's right." Says Aria. "You don't have to worry."

"You don't have to say anything you don't want to say." Says Emily. "But we want to be here for you." I can't say no. Besides, Wilden would find a worse why to reveal it to them later if I prevent him from doing it now. And Emily is right, I don't have to say anything I don't want to say.

"Alright." I say. "Let's do it." Toby slips his hand into mine. It anchors me.

"Why don't you start by telling me what happened the night you went missing." Says Wilden. He takes out a folder and looks it over while he waits for me to speak. His hands shake. He's still not sure I won't tell the truth.

"It's hard to remember exactly." I say. It's a lie. I remember every detail. From the time they took me, to now. Every gruesome moment is forever ingrained in my mind.

"Just tell me what you can." Says Wilden.

"I remember walking into my house after Toby dropped me off. It was late. There was someone there. I tried to get away, but they grabbed me. The next thing I knew, I was somewhere else." I say. The room is tense and deathly silent.

"Do you remember what time that was Toby?" asks Wilden.

"About seven." Toby whispers. His grip in my hand tightens.

"Can you tell me anything about the place they took you to?" asks Wilden. He's more relaxed now.

"Not really. It was dark. Always too dark to see anything." I say.

"Were you there the entire seven months you were missing?"

"Yes." I say.

"How did you get away?" he asks. Wilden truly wants to know the answer to this question. I can see it in his eyes.

"I don't know. I woke up the other day. I was alone, in the woods just outside of town. So I walked to Aria's house." I say. He knows I'm lying.

"Can you tell me what happened to you while you were missing?" Wilden hides a smile behind the folder he's holding. He's enjoying this. The pain it's causing the people I love. He makes me sick.

"I don't remember much." I say.

"That's hard to believe considering what it says in the medical report I got from the doctor." Wilden hold up the folder. "According to this you have plenty to remember."

"I don't recall." I say. Our gazes lock. He's wondering how far he can push me without harming himself.

"The report says that there is clear evidence of long term torture. Scars, broken bones that have healed wrong, etcetera. The deep cuts around your wrists and ankles suggest that you where continuously bound. And the rape kit done on you shows that you were raped violently several times. How can you not remember any of that?" says Wilden.

"Detective!" shouts my father. "That was highly inappropriate, not to mention cruel."

Wilden stares at me a moment longer. He was trying to get a reaction out of me. Trying to see if he could break me. But he can't break me. All he did was make me livid. But I won't give him the satisfaction by reacting. I stare right back at him. My expression unchanging. He finally breaks the stare and looks up at my father.

"Forgive me Mr. Hastings, I got carried away." Says Wilden.

"Get. Out. Now." Say dad says. His face is beat red with anger.

"Of course, sorry for my behavior." Says Wilden. He starts to leave, but pauses in the door way. "Just one more question Spencer."

"I thought I told you to leave." My dad says.

"It's alright dad." I say. I don't want Wilden to think he has shaken me. "Ask your question detective."

"Do you remember who did this to you?" he asks. I almost smile at his boldness. Almost.

"No. I never saw his face." I lie. He smiles. Then he leaves.

I move my eyes over the people in the room and survey the damage Wilden has done. My father is barely holding in his rage and my mom has a distant look on her face. They both already knew what was in that medical report, but that doesn't make it any easier.

The girls and Melissa are all sobbing, and none of them will meet my eyes. And finally, I look at Toby. He's looking directly at me. Silent tears fall down his face. His body is almost vibrating with unspoken emotion. He doesn't say a word, but those blue eyes speak volumes. They tell me that he will never judge me, and that he'll support and love me no matter what. They also speak of murder. He's aching to kill the person who did this to me.

It feels so odd to be around all this emotion. Everyone feeling so strongly. They probably expect me to cry too. But I'm not going to cry, not over this. I came to a point months ago were I had to decide if I was going to let what was happing to me crush me, or if I was going to use the trauma to become stronger. I chose the latter. I chose to survive. So I stopped letting myself feel and I accepted the terrible things that happened to me. That's what it took to live. And the fight is not over yet. This isn't the time to be weak. I just hope the girls and Toby make the same choice. They can't let the truth crush them.

* * *

Emily's POV

What do you say when you've just heard that the worst thing imaginable has happened to your best friend? Nothing. You don't say a word, because there's nothing you can say to make to better. So that's what we do. We stay quiet. No one says anything.

When I manage to stop crying, I look up at Spencer. Her thin face isn't contorted with pain like everyone else's. In fact, she looks almost….peaceful. She's watching Toby's hands as they run soothing circles over hers. How can she look so strong after everything that has happened to her? Does she really not remember?

At some point a nurse comes in to check Spencer's stitches, and we're all asked to leave. Her parents and Melissa stay close to the door, but we three girls follow Toby. He walks down the halls of the hospital like a man on a mission. He stops when he finds an empty waiting room. He walk inside and starts punch the wall.

"I'll fucking kill him." He screams as he continues to slam his fist into the wall.

"Toby!" I yell. I put myself between him in the wall. His fist stops mid-flight and he glares at me. "This isn't going to help Spencer."

"Emily's right. We need to stay calm." Says Aria.

"Calm? Are you kidding me? How can I be calm after hearing what happened to her." Say Toby. He looks like he's about to attack the wall again, so I throw my arms around him.

"Please Toby. Please. Spencer isn't the only one who needs you to stay strong." I say. I start to cry. He puts his arms around me, and soon he's trying to hold back his own sobs.

"What do we do?" he asks.

"I don't know." I say. At that moment, all of our phones, even Toby's, goes off. I pull away from Toby and look at Aria and Hanna. They look as worried as I feel.

We all take our phones out and look at the text we got.

**Spencer's going to wish she never came back home. It's time to play bitches. - A**

"What the hell!" screams Toby. "I thought –A was gone."

"-A's been back for months." I say.

"And you haven't told anybody?" ask Toby.

"We can't." says Aria. "-A has something on us. It's bad."

"It's all my fault." I say.

"We've been over this Emily, it's not your fault." Says Hanna.

"Why didn't you tell me?" says Toby.

"You weren't there." I say. It's a low blow, but it's the truth.

"What are we going to do? It sounds like –A is going after Spencer." says Aria.

"Like hell." Says Hanna. "-A will have to crawl over my dead corpse before he or she gets anywhere near Spencer."

"Hanna's right. Protecting Spencer has to be our number one priority." Says Toby.

"So what's our next move?" I ask. I'm met with silence.

* * *

Aria's POV

We try to act relaxed when we go back to Spencer's room. But it's not easy. –A's new threat has left us all on edge. And it doesn't help that we have no idea what to do. I feel like I'm about to jump out of my skin. I feel so nervous that I almost scream when I hear a knock at the door. It's Spencer's doctor.

"Hello Spencer. How are you feeling?" asks her doctor.

"Good, a little tired maybe." She says.

"That's to be expected." He says. He looks over her chart and checks her vitals. "Everything is looking really good Spencer. I think we'll be able to release you tomorrow."

"Really?" says Mrs. Hastings. "That seems a little soon."

"Physically there's nothing critically wrong with Spencer, besides being weak and malnourished. She might need some physical therapy to help rebuild her muscles, and she'll need to come back in a week to get her stiches out. But I think she'll heal better in the comfort of her home." he says.

"Okay, if you think that's for the best." Says Mr. Hastings. "It will be good to get her back home."

"How about you Spencer, you ready to go home?" the doctor asks.

"More than ready." Says Spencer.

"Good, I just need to discuss a few things with your parents. Mr. and Mrs. Hastings, if you would follow me?" the doctor leads Spencer's parents out of the room. I clear my throat.

"I'm glad you get to go home Spencer." I say.

"Me too." She says. I try to think of something else to say, but I come up empty. Spencer smiles at me as if to let me know that it's okay.

"Hey Melissa." says Spencer.

"Yeah?" she says.

"Could you step outside for a minute? Visiting hours are almost over and I wanted to talk to the girls and Toby about something before they have to leave." Says Spencer.

"Sure thing Spencer. I was about to go to the cafeteria anyway." Says Melissa. She leaves and closes the door behind her. It's the first time we've all been alone together since Spencer's return.

"I'm sorry." Says Spencer.

"For what?" Toby asks. His voice is raw, like he's been screaming.

"Wilden's interview. I didn't want you guys to find out that way." She say. "Actually, I didn't want you to find out at all."

"You don't have to say sorry for that asshole." Says Hanna. Spencer smiles.

"So you weren't going to tell us what happened." asks Toby.

"What good would it have done?" says Spencer. Toby doesn't say anything.

"Is it true that you don't remember anything." I ask.

"No. I lied." Says Spencer.

"Why?" asks Emily. Spencer doesn't hesitate in her response.

"Because Wilden is –A."

* * *

**So what did you think? Did you like that chapter? PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW!**

**-Rin Shade **


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks so much for all the support and reviews, favorites, and follows. Thank you tobyequalshattness, HopefulSpobyShipper, Luuw5683, vondydora, and Emilyjayden101 for the great reviews. **

**Fluffy Tazzy, great guess on who the mystery man is, but it's not Miranda's uncle. But that would have been pretty awesome. I never thought about mixing in Ravenswood with the story.**

**Caitycaites, good question. Detective Wilden was not the one who raped Spencer, it was the other guy. His identity will be revealed soon. Until then, feel free to keep guessing. **

**Emilee Amethyst, I'm glad you started reading. I hope you continue to enjoy the story. **

**de3r, no it isn't Garrett. This story follows the story line of the show up until the end of season 2, so Garrett is in jail.**

**I hope all of you enjoy this chapter. I drop a major hint about the mystery man. I don't own anything.**

* * *

"_Is it true that you don't remember anything?" I ask._

"_No. I lied." Says Spencer._

"_Why?" asks Emily. Spencer doesn't hesitate in her response. _

"_Because Wilden is –A."_

* * *

Chapter 10 – This Is War

Spencer's POV

I had to tell them. It was too dangerous for them not to know. They needed to know who the enemy was. Who to avoid. I wish I could have told them in a more…..gentler way, but there just wasn't time to beat around the bush. I knew they were going to freak out, but I wasn't quite prepared for their reactions. But I guess when you drop a bomb, you better be ready for an explosion.

Everyone starts talking and yelling at once. I can't understand anyone. I try to speak to them, but my voice is too weak to be heard. So I just sit and listen to them, hoping they'll calm down on their own. This goes on for a few minutes, until Toby decides enough is enough.

"Quiet!" he shouts. Toby leaves no room for argument. Everyone shuts up. "Alright, let's just calm down for a minute. I'm sure Spencer will tell us everything if we give her chance."

"Thanks Toby." I say. His name feels sweet on my tongue.

"We're sorry Spencer. It's just a little unexpected." Says Emily.

"I know. It's a lot to take in, but you guys needed to know." I say.

"I don't want to come off like I don't believe you, but are you sure?" asks Hanna.

"Yes. I'm sure." I say. "Wilden is –A. And not just a member of the –A team. He runs the whole damn thing. He always has. He's been behind everything."

"How did you find out about all this?" asks Aria.

"I learned a lot of things while I was…gone." I say.

"Wait. Are you saying…Was Wilden the one who took you?" asks Toby. He doesn't wait for my answer. He's jumps out of his seat. "Did he do this to you? Did he…..Shit! That fucking bastard was here! He was in here with you." Toby is half way to the door before I realize what's happening. He's going after Wilden. He can't. Wilden would be ready for him. He'll kill Toby. And if by some miracle Toby does manage to kill Wilden, he'll spend the rest of his life in jail. I can't let that happen.

"No! Toby please." I yell, he doesn't stop. "Don't leave me!" he stops right in front of the door. Was it what I said? Or maybe he could hear the faint traces of fear in my voice. It doesn't really matter. I got his attention. I got him to stop.

"It wasn't him Toby. Wilden didn't do this to me." I say. It's mostly true. Wilden left me with the madman who tortured me. He may be responsible for my situation, but technically, it was someone else's hands who did most of the damage. For now, I need to tell Toby what he needs to hear.

"Don't lie to me to protect me Spencer." he says, he turns around and walks back over to me.

"I'm not." I say. "It's the truth."

"Then who did it?" he asks.

"You don't know him." I say. But that's a lie. In fact, Toby is the only one in the room who does know him.

"I don't need to know him to kill him." He says.

"Sorry Toby, but someone already beat you to him." I say.

"What?" he says.

"The man who did this to me is dead. That's the only reason I got away." I say. I look I don't recognize flashes across Toby's face. Relief? Maybe Regret?

"Are you sure?" asks Aria.

"Positive." I say.

"Who killed him?" asks Toby.

"A girl. You wouldn't know her either." I say. That wasn't a lie. Only truth.

"So what should we do now?" asks Hanna.

"There's a lot of things I need to tell you guys. But visiting hours are almost over, and my parents will be back soon. So it will have to wait until I'm home and I have plenty of time to talk to you alone. For now, we need to play it safe. Wilden knows that I know he's –A. He's desperate. And there's nothing more dangerous than a desperate person." I say.

"Are you saying we shouldn't do anything?" asks Emily. "Because I'm ready to go kick his ass."

"Wilden is smart. He's prepared. He doesn't just have things on us. He has information that will send everyone love, friends, family, everyone, to jail. Or worse." I say. "The only reason he hasn't done this yet is because I know his deepest darkest secrets, and he thinks I have proof."

"Do you have proof?" asks Aria.

"No, but I know where it is." I say. "And if we play our cards right, we can take down Wilden and the –A team without going to jail ourselves."

"So what's the next step Spencer?" asks Toby.

"Be smart. Be safe." I say. "Don't go anywhere alone, and don't go anywhere near Wilden."

"I'm going to have a hard time staying away from him." Says Toby.

"Toby, you might think you're doing me a favor if you go after him but you're not." I say.

"He hurt you Spencer. Even if you're telling me the truth and he didn't do this to you, he's done so many other things. I've watched you suffer because of him, we've all suffered because of him, and I can't just let him get away with It." he says.

"Toby, you can't. If something happens to you. If you go to jail…Toby I need you. After everything that's happened. I wouldn't survive if anything happened to you." I say. "I told you that you saved me, and you did. Thinking about you, remembering you, believing that I would see you again. It was the only thing that gave me hope. The only thing that kept me going. I'll never stop thanking you for that. But I still need that hope Toby. I need it to survive. And if you get yourself thrown in jail, or killed, you take away my hope. My life."

"Spencer. I…"

"I don't care about Wilden or the –A team. I care about my family, my friends, you." I say. "Wilden isn't going to get away with anything. We will take him down, but we'll do it the right way."

"Okay." Says Toby. He reaches up and wipes a tear off my face. I didn't realize I was crying. "We'll play it safe. I won't go near Wilden until you say I can. And we'll all make it through this." I can tell he wants to say more, but he's holding back. Waiting until he can talk to me alone.

"Thank you." I whisper.

"I love you Spencer." he says.

"I love you too." I say.

"We all love you Spencer." says Aria.

"Thank you guys." I say. There's a knock at the door. It slowly opens and Melissa steps in.

"Hey, sorry to interrupt, but visiting hours ended ten minutes ago and I can't hold off the doctors anymore." Says Melissa.

"Okay, well I guess I'll see you guys later." I say. "We'll talk more soon." Toby kisses my forehead.

"Just call if you need anything." He says.

"I will. Be safe." I say.

"I'll be safe." He says.

"And you might want to try sleeping in your bed instead of a car tonight." I say.

"How did you…."

"It's obvious." I say. "Take care of yourself." He hugs me, but doesn't promise me he won't sleep in his truck again.

"We'll come see you tomorrow Spencer." says Hanna.

"Get some rest." Says Emily.

"Love you Spence." Says Aria.

"I love you guys too." I say. They all start to leave when I call out. "Hey Aria. Can you hang back a minute."

"Sure." She says. Toby looks like he wants to stay and hear what I'm going to say, but he can tell that this is a private conversation, so he leaves reluctantly.

"I'll try to buy you a few more minutes." Says Melissa.

"Thanks." I say. Once she closes the door, I turn to Aria.

"I'm sorry for throwing all this at you guys." I say to her.

"No, I'm glad you told us. Secrets have never done us any good." She says. "If everyone was honest we might not even be in this mess."

"You're probably right." I say. "But sometimes you can't avoid lying. Sometimes you have to lie to protect the ones you love."

"You're right. Protecting the ones you love come first, even before honesty." She says.

"That's why I just lied to Toby, to keep him safe." I say.

"What did you lie about?" she asks.

"Wilden wasn't the one who hurt me, not really. But he is the one took me." I say. "I saw something I shouldn't have so he kidnaped me and took me to a friend of his. His friend was the one that hurt me, but Wilden was the reason he did it."

"Oh my god." Says Aria.

"You can't tell anyone, not yet." I say.

"Why can't Hanna and Emily know?" she asks. "I mean…this is huge."

"Hanna is awful at keeping secrets, and Emily would never keep something like this from Toby. And Toby can't know. If Toby goes after Wilden, he'll get killed." I say.

"So why tell me." she says.

"Because you're my best friend. My sister. Because I need you to understand how dangerous Wilden really is. And because I need you to do something for me." I say.

"Anything." Says Aria.

"I need you to make sure the others stay safe. They know how dangerous –A is, but they have no idea what Wilden is capable of." I say.

"I'll make sure we stay safe." She says.

"And keep an eye on Toby. He has always been able to tell if I'm lying. I wasn't exactly lying, but I'm not sure if he believed me. And if he doesn't believe me about this, then he might still go after Wilden." I say.

"Can you blame him? I mean, I'm about to go kill Wilden myself." She says with tears in her eyes.

"Please Aria. I need you to do this." I say. She sighs.

"I'll watch out for everyone, and I'll make sure Toby stays away from Wilden. I promise." She says. "But I can't keep this secret forever."

"You won't have to." I say.

"I better go before they drag me out of here." Says Aria.

"Okay." I say. "Thank you."

"You would do the same for me." she says. She turns around, but she doesn't leave. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." I say.

"How are you doing this?" she asks.

"Doing what?" I ask.

"Doing anything. After what happened to you. If it were me, I don't think I would be even be able to speak. But you….. You're calm. You're acting like none of this even bothers you. How the hell are you keeping it together." she asks.

"Practice. A lot of practice."

* * *

After Aria left, Melissa came in and sat with me. My mom and dad went home to get everything ready for me to come home tomorrow. Melissa I and talk for a while. I don't tell her anything about –A or Wilden. I don't want her involved if she doesn't have to be.

After a while, she falls asleep in her chair, and I'm left alone with my thoughts. I'm still overwhelmed with happiness. I don't think I'll ever get over the blissful feeling of being home and with my family and friends. But despite this happiness, I still worry.

There's so much to do. I would love to sit back, rest, and just enjoy my new found freedom, but there's no time for that. I have to get started on my plan to take down Wilden right away. There will be time for rest after he's dead.

I also have Toby and the girls to worry about. Will Wilden try to hurt them before I can make my first move? Will Toby try to go after Wilden? So many things could go wrong. So many people could be hurt. So many people have already been hurt in Wilden's twisted game. Alison, Maya, even Toby's Mother.

No. it's time to stop waiting to play by Wilden's rules. This has never been a game. This is war.

* * *

**What did you guys think? I drop two hints about the identity of Wilden's friend. Who do you think it is? And is he really dead? And if so, who killed him? PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW and tell me what you think will happen next.**

**-Rin Shade **


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you all so much for the reviews. I was very impressed with the predictions some of you made. Unfortunately, I can't confirm nor deny anything. Not yet anyway. Read the note at the end of this chapter to find out if you guessed right! I hope you all enjoy the chapter. I don't own anything.**

* * *

_I also have Toby and the girls to worry about. Will Wilden try to hurt them before I can make my first move? Will Toby try to go after Wilden? So many things could go wrong. So many people could be hurt. So many people have already been hurt in Wilden's twisted game. Alison, Maya, even Toby's Mother. _

_No. it's time to stop waiting to play by Wilden's rules. This has never been a game. This is war._

* * *

Chapter 11- Lions and Lambs

Spencer's POV

I'm exhausted. I spent all last night having one nightmare after another. I guess what happened to me is affecting me more than I realized. I've worked so hard to try and be strong and not let anything bother me, but in the end, I'm still human. I suppose that's a good thing. It's only natural to think about the things that happened. I just wish I wouldn't dream about it. At least I didn't scream this time.

I give up on trying to sleep by sunrise, and decide to watch some TV. Big mistake. The only thing on this early is news, and the only thing on the news is me. My yearbook picture fills the screen as reporters talk about me and my return.

I seems like they don't have that many details, which I'm grateful for. All they really know is that I was abducted about seven months ago and that I'm in the hospital listed under stable condition. It could be worse.

I'm about to shut off the television when the reporter switches to another story. A man's face appears on the screen. I freeze. I had hoped to never see that face again.

* * *

_Flashback_

"_It doesn't matter Spencer." Ali says. _

"_Yes it does. It matters. Knowledge is power. When you know everything, you can't lose. So you have to tell me, because I'm not about to lose." I say. She looks at me. Her face lights up. She tries to hide it, but I see it. Hope._

"_You're right Spencer." she say. "I do need to tell you. I need to tell you everything." _

"_Yes you do." I try to focus on Ali. I need to clearly hear everything she says, but the pain pulsing in my body is the most intense thing I've ever felt. More tears start to fall down my face as the pain starts to overwhelm me. _

"_Spencer, are you okay." Ali sits next to me, her cold hand wraps around mine. A sob escapes my throat. This is all just too much too fast. Being taken from my house, finding out Wilden is –A, and that Alison is alive._

"_I wish Toby was here." I don't mean to say it loud, but I do. Ali's eyes get wide._

"_Toby? As in Toby Cavanaugh?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_Why would you want him here?" Ali starts to shake. Then I remember that Ali and Toby don't have a good history._

"_He's my boyfriend. You were wrong about him Ali. He's a great guy." My breathing fells easier just thinking about him._

"_Yeah, I know he is. I treated him terribly. He didn't deserve it." she looks down. "I'm surprised you would date him. He's your complete opposite."_

"_He is, but I think that's why it works." Ali runs a hand through her hair and sighs._

"_Toby doesn't know it, but his mixed up in all of this too." She says, gesturing around the room. _

"_What? How?" my mind starts racing for answers, but I come up empty._

"_It's a long story. I don't know where to start." She says._

"_Try the beginning." Ali nods. She starts to speak, but she doesn't get the chance to say anything. The sound of heave locks turning causes her to freeze. I watch in horror as her eyes full with terror. I've never seen Ali, or anyone, look so afraid. A feeling of dread squeezes my heart._

_The heave metal door swings open. A man steps in. He's wearing a crisp white uniform. His hair is cut close to his scalp, and he has dark skin and brown eyes. He looks normal. Harmless. He closes the door behind him._

"_You're not dead." He says to me. "Good." That's when I see it. Deep in his eyes. It's almost unnoticeable. That tiny gleam of insanity. He slowly walks up to me. Ali curls in on herself. He ignores her. His full attention is on me. He crouches next to me. I can feel his hot breath on my skin. I try to move away, but my injured body doesn't allow it. He leans in closer and kisses my cheek. I try not to throw up._

"_Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Eddie Lamb."_

_-end_

* * *

"Local man, Eddie Lamb, was reported missing after being absent from his job at Radley Sanitarium. The police are conduction a full investigation into his disappearance, but so far they have no leads." I let the reporter's voice pull me from my memories.

I watch as they show Eddie Lambs face again and ask the public to call the police if they know anything. Anyone else watching this would see an average man. But I see a monster. I turn off the TV. I look down at my hands. I'm shaking, and it pisses me off. I hate that a simple picture can rattle me. I need to be stronger if I'm going to survive. I can't let my guard down. Not now.

I take a deep breath. Eddie Lamb doesn't matter anymore. He's dead. He'll never hurt anyone again. I lean back into the bed. I wonder if Wilden has found his body yet. I'm sure Wilden covered the whole thing up if he did. He couldn't have the police finding him. The discovery of Eddie Lamb's body would unearth a lot of Wildens secrets. Wilden would never let that happen.

"Spencer?" I turn and look at Melissa as she walks into the room. "You were kind of zoned out there, are you okay?"

"Yeah, just tired." I smile.

"Mom and dad are back. They're talking to the doctor right now about discharging you." She sits on end of the bed. "Are you ready to go home?"

"So ready."

"I got you some clothes." She holds up a shopping bag. "I bought you some new ones. I don't think your old ones would fit you."

"Thanks Melissa." I take the bag and set it in my lap. I don't bother to look inside.

"Are you sure you're alright?" she studies my face. I sigh deeply and close my eyes.

"I'm as good as I can be, considering everything that's happened." I don't open my eyes again. Melissa stays quiet. I don't know if I upset her, or if she thinks I'm sleeping. Either way, I'm happy to have a moment to think before my parents come in. I need time to clear all thoughts of Eddie Lamb from my mind.

* * *

Toby's POV

The sun set about an hour ago. I didn't get to see Spencer today. Her parents told the girls and me that we could come see her after they got her settled in at home. Mr. Hastings called us around four in the afternoon and told us that we could come over. But by the time we got there, Spencer was asleep in her room. We waited around for a while, but it became obvious that she was out for the night. All the moving around took a toll on her.

After we left Spencer's house, Emily asked me if I wanted to get some food with her and the girls. I wasn't hungry. I tried to turn her down, but she wouldn't take no for an answer. We all went to Hanna's house and got some take out. I managed to eat a little and the four of us talked for an hour or so. It wasn't so bad. I almost enjoyed it. But I had other things on my mind and I was relieved to get out of there.

I slow my truck down and pull off to the side off the road. I shut my lights off and kill the engine. I look out my window and watch as detective Wilden steps out of his car. He walks into the Grill like he doesn't have a care in the world. My hands curl into fists. My knuckles turn white.

I couldn't tell if Spencer was telling the truth about Wilden not being the one to hurt her. If she is lying, she's doing it to protect me. When is she going to start putting herself first? Spencer. My beautiful Spencer. It broke my heart to watch her in the hospital using all her power to stay strong. And it shattered my soul to hear what she had to go though. I've tried not to picture it.

That's why I'm here, watching Wilden. Spencer said he's dangerous. I plan on making sure he doesn't even think about coming near Spencer. I need to make sure Spencer doesn't feel pain ever again. I need to protect her. It's the least I can do.

"Why am I not surprised?" I jump at the sound of a voice breaking the lonely silence. I turn to see Aria leaning into my passenger window.

"Damn it Aria!" I yell "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question." She opens the door and slides into the truck. "Didn't you promise Spencer you would stay away from Wilden?"

"How did you even know I was here?" I say, ignoring her question.

"I followed you?" she looks proud of herself. "You were too busy watching Wilden to notice."

"Why are you follow me." I ask. She looks at me and bites her lip.

"Spencer loves you Toby. More than anything. She's worried you might do something stupid, like stalk Wilden, and get yourself kill. She would lose it if anything happened to you." I close my eyes and shake my head.

"Spencer asked you to keep an eye on me, didn't she? That's why she asked you to hang back last night."

"Looks like she was right to ask." Says Aria.

"Same old Spencer." I smile.

"Yeah. Almost." Aria looks out the window and watches Wilden as he orders his food. "I could kill him you know. I could kill him, and not even feel bad about it." her words shock me. Aria isn't the violent type.

"You're not a killer Aria."

"I could be. If I had to." She looks down at her lap. "Maybe it would be worth it, going to jail for his murder. At least it would end things."

"But you'd be in jail." This conversation starts to make me worry about Aria.

"But everyone I care about would be safe. Once and for all." She looks up at me with tears in her eyes. "Spencer has be through so much Toby, and she can't live without you in her life. It would break her if you went to jail. So if your plan here is to kill Wilden, if you really can't let him live, tell me and I'll kill him for you."

"Aria…..I…."

"It will hurt Spencer if I go to jail, but she'll survive. But she won't if you go." Aria's crying now. "I promised Spencer I would keep you safe. And if I have kill Wilden and go to prison to do that, I will."

"Oh Aria." I reach across the seat and pull her into a hug. She sobs into my shoulder while I rub her back. "I'm not going to kill Wilden. No one's going to kill anyone and no one's going to jail, especially you. We'll find another way to end all this. Everything's going to work out. We'll all be okay. I promise."

"How can you be so sure." She pulls away and looks up at me. "Look at what happened to Spencer. She could've died. We could all still die."

"No one is going to die."

"-A has always been one step ahead of us the entire time. Why should it be any different now?" I grab her shoulders and look straight into her eyes.

"Because we're not fighting –A anymore, we're fighting Wilden. He's not some all-knowing, all powerful being. He's just one crazy cop. And if Spencer says we can beat him, then we can beat him." She wipes the tears off her face with the back of her hand.

"Do you really think we can beat him?" I smile

"I know we can." She takes a shaky breath in.

"You can't just go off on your own like this now that Spencer's back. You've got to take care of yourself." She says.

"I know. I'm sorry. I'll stay away from Wilden."

"You promise."

"I promise. I just got carried away. It won't happen again."

"Okay." She says. I start my truck up.

"I'll take you home. I can't let you drive when you're upset like this."

"What about my car?"

"I'll pick it up for you later." I pull away from the curb and head towards Aria's house, leaving Wilden behind.

"Thank you." Aria's voice is soft and fragile.

"It no problem."

"No, not for the car, for promising to stay away from Wilden. I know it won't be easy for you."

"Well you right, Spencer needs need me to be safe more than I need revenge." I say. "But you were wrong about one thing."

"And what might that be." I stop my truck in front of her house.

"Spencer wouldn't survive you going to jail either." I say. "We all need to stay safe Aria, you included."

"I'll keep that in mind." She says. "Thanks for the ride."

I watch as Aria walks into her house, then I head home. As I drive, I think about what Aria said. Would it really be worth going to jail if it meant saving the ones you love?

* * *

**Congratulations vondydora for guessing that the mystery man was Eddie Lamb! Your deductive skills have amazed me. 1000 points! What did you guys think of the chapter? PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW!**

**-Rin Shade **


	12. Chapter 12

**Thanks for all the great reviews! Sorry about being a few days late with this update, life got in the way. But better late than never I guess. I'll try to be more punctual next time. I got the title for this chapter form the song A Winter's Day Monologue by Saturday night at the Apollo. The lyrics remind me of Spoby. And as always, I don't own anything.**

* * *

"_Well you right, Spencer needs need me to be safe more than I need revenge." I say. "But you were wrong about one thing."_

"_And what might that be." I stop my truck in front of her house._

"_Spencer wouldn't survive you going to jail either." I say. "We all need to stay safe Aria, you included."_

"_I'll keep that in mind." She says. "Thanks for the ride."_

_I watch as Aria walks into her house, then I head home. As I drive, I think about what Aria said. Would it really be worth going to jail if it meant saving the ones you love?_

* * *

Chapter 12- Hold me close, I'm falling faster

Toby's POV

I park in front of the high school and wait for the girls. Emily had called me earlier and asked if I could give her and the girls a ride over to Spencer's house after school. Emily's been really on edge since she found out that Wilden is –A. She wants us all to stick close together, even if that mean cramming four people into the front seat of my truck.

I hear the school bell ring and I watch as students start to flood out of the school. After a few minutes, I see Emily, Hanna, and Aria, and they look pissed. I've always found it both scary and funny to see the girls get riled up about something.

As soon as they get to my truck, the three girls pile in. The tension around them is thick enough to swim laps in. It had been their first day back to school since Spencer came home.

"So, did you girls have a good day?" apparently that was the wrong thing to say. Three pairs of eyes turn and glare at me.

"Does it look like we had a good day?" Hanna snaps.

"Hanna, leave him alone. It's not his fault." Says Emily.

"What happened?" I ask. Aria sighs and rubs her temples.

"What didn't happen." She mumbles. I look to Emily for a translation.

"Everyone at school was all over us about what happened to Spencer. Even the teachers." Says Emily. "We didn't get a moment's peace."

"Yeah, and the jackasses that weren't asking us questions were spreading stupid rumors and lies about Spencer and what 'really' happened." Hanna says with air quotes.

"What were they saying about her?" I ask.

"It doesn't matter." Says Aria. "Can we just get going already, I really want to see Spencer." I think about pressing Aria for more information, but I take one look at her and change my mind. She looks exhausted. I don't think she's gotten over her little break down last night.

I start my truck up and I pull out of the school. I eye the girls as I drive. They've changed so much. Spencer's disappearance has been so hard them. All three of them had developed their own, not so healthy, way of dealing with it. Hopefully they'll get better now that Spencer's back.

"Do you think Spencer will go back to school?" asks Aria as she stares out the window.

"I don't know." I answer.

"I think she might." Says Aria.

"Why do you think that?" asks Emily. "I mean, after everything she went through, she might have a hard time handling school."

"That's what I thought at first, but she's different. She's handling everything so well. I don't know how, but she is. She just seems….. I don't know, strong." Say Aria

"Do you think it's an act? Like she's just trying to be strong for us?" ask Hanna.

"No. It's not an act." I say.

"How do you know?" she asks.

"I could see it in her eyes. There wasn't any fear or weakness in her eyes. There was only fire."

We ride in silence the rest of the way to Spencer's house. Mr. Hastings opens the door for us before I could even knock.

"Hello Toby, girls, come on in." we step inside and into the kitchen, were Spencer's mom is busy cooking. She turns to us and smiles.

"You four are right on time. I'm making an early dinner, I hope you're hungry." She says.

"You didn't have to go to all this trouble Mrs. Hastings." Says Emily.

"It's no trouble at all. Besides, a small dinner with family and friends is a good way to celebrate." Her words sound both sad and happy. I didn't even think that was possible.

"Well, thank you for having us over." I say. "Where's Spencer?"

"She's up in her room. She just woke up a little while ago."

"Can we go up and see her?" asks Aria.

"Sure, but tell her that dinner will be ready in thirty minutes." She says. We turn to leave, but I pause and turn back to Mr. and Mrs. Hastings.

"How is she?" I ask. Mrs. Hastings stops cutting up vegetables and looks at me.

"Surprisingly well. In fact, she seems happy."

"You say that like it's a bad thing." I say.

"It's just…..well you heard what happened to her. I was expecting more of a reaction from her, but so far she's been so stable. I'm worried that at any moment she just might fall apart."

"Well, all we can do is hope that doesn't happen." I say.

* * *

Spencer's POV

I just had my first shower in seven months. It felt amazing. I pull on a loose t-shirt and yoga pants. I could've stayed in the shower for hours, but I was too tired to stand under the hot water any longer. The doctor wasn't kidding when he said it would take a while to build my strength back up.

I was tired after coming home from the hospital yesterday. I ended up falling asleep as soon as I got home. I slept all night. My mom got me up in the morning to eat, but then I went back to sleep. I guess I needed the rest.

I sit down on the end of my bed and look around my room. I haven't really gotten the chance to look at it yet, not there's much to see. It looks exactly the same as I remember. Nothing was touched. Nothing moved. It's like I never left. The only thing that is different is me.

I look at my reflection in my mirror. I almost don't recognize myself. I haven't gotten a good look at myself in a while. I actually look better than I thought I did. But I still don't look that great. My hair is much shorter than I've ever had it. It barely touches my shoulders. I'm overly skinny. My clothes manage to cover most of the scars, except for then one running down the left side of my face.

I smile. It's not so bad. No, not bad at all. The scar is a nice reminder of how strong I've become. And I could use a reminder every now and then. _I did it Ali. I survived, just like I promised._ I almost don't hear the soft knock at my door.

"Come in." the door opens and Aria, Hanna, Emily, and Toby come in. I ease myself up from my bed.

"You don't have to get up." Says Aria.

"Of course I do. I'm tired of hugging you guys from a bed." I walk over and hug Aria. Her small body shakes as she tries not to cry. The girls take turns hugging me. And then Toby steps up to me. There's so much I want to say to him, but I just don't have the words. Instead, I lean into his strong but gentle hug. I let his sent fill my noise. I reluctantly pull away and look around the room at everyone.

"How are you feeling?" asks Hanna.

"Good. It's good to be home."

"That's good." She says. I can tell the girls and Toby don't really know how to acted around me. I don't blame them. I would feel the same way if I was in there position. But I don't want them to walk on egg shells around me.

"Okay. Everyone sit down. We need to talk. Toby, could you get the door." Toby closes my door while everyone finds a place to sit down. Toby leads me to chair and helps me sit down, then he sits down next to me. He wraps his warm hand around mine without hesitation. He gives me more than enough strength to speak.

"There's a lot of things I need to tell you guys, a lot of things you want and need to know. But there's something else I need to say first." Everyone's eyes are glued to me. "You all need to know that…..that I'm not the girl you remember. I've changed. A lot. And I know you and everyone else is just waiting for me to break down, but that's not going to happen. I realize what happened to me was horrible, but I got over it a long time ago. I know that you might not believe it, but please trust me when I say that I'm going to be alright."

"How. How can you possibly be alright with what happen?" Asks Emily as she tries to hold back her tears.

"Because I didn't have a choice."

"What do you mean?" asks Toby. I look up at him. He's thinner than I remember. I didn't notice this before because of the beard he had grown. But now that he shaved, I can see that his cheek bones are more visible than before. I know it's because of me. Me being abducted broke his heart, and the more details I tell him the more I'll break him. But I don't have any other option.

"It's….it's hard to explain." I say. Toby wraps his arm around me and kisses the top of my head.

"It's okay Spencer. We're here for you. I'm here for you." I feel myself relax, and I know that I never have to worry about falling apart when he holds me close in his arms. If I ever run out of my own strength, Toby will be there to share his.

"When I was there. When I was being… I was a mess. I was broken. I was giving up. I wanted to die. And at my lowest moment, I knew that my mind was going to die long before my body ever did. I had a choice to make. I could either feel sorry for myself and die, or I could fight and stay strong. Giving up would've been easier, but I want….no, I needed to come home. So I got tough, and eventually, the things that were happening to me got easier to deal with."

Everyone gets real quiet. I watch them as they try to take in what I just said. Aria is the first to speak.

"I'm so sorry Spencer. You should never have had to be that strong in the first place. And I don't think any of us will ever understand what you went through, or how you got through It." she whispers. "But I do know that we're all glad that you were strong enough to survive. And we all need to be strong right know. –A is still out there. And it's going to take all our strength to take him down."

"Aria's right." Says Toby, his voice cracks and there's tears in his eyes. He look at me and smiles. "If you're ready to tell us about –A, then we're ready to hear it."

"Yeah, It's time for Wilden to go down." Says Hanna.

"Okay. But, it's not going to be easy. Some of the things I'm going to tell you will change everything you thought you knew. But all of you deserve to know the truth." I say.

"We're ready." Says Emily. I take a deep breath.

"The first thing you should know is that the night Alison disappeared isn't the night she died."

"What!" they all shout at the same time.

"Alison wasn't murdered that night, she was taken. She was taken to the same place I was."

"How do you know all this?" asks Toby.

"Because….because when I got there… she was still there."

* * *

_Flashback_

"_You're not dead." He says to me. "Good." That's when I see it. Deep in his eyes. It's almost unnoticeable. That tiny gleam of insanity. He slowly walks up to me. Ali curls in on herself. He ignores her. His full attention is on me. He crouches next to me. I can feel his hot breath on my skin. I try to move away, but my injured body doesn't allow it. He leans in closer and kisses my cheek. I try not to throw up._

"_Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Eddie Lamb."_

"_Get away from her!" yells Alison. His head snaps up in her direction._

"_Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt her. Not yet anyway. If I play with her right now she probably wouldn't survive. And that wouldn't be any fun. She has to heal up before she can play my games." He stands up and stretches. "You however, my dear Alison, should have no trouble playing with me."_

_Alison starts shaking and she sinks back into a corner._

"_No no no no no. Please no." she whimpers. He doesn't listen. He reaches down and grabs her by her hair and pulls her to her feet. She screams._

"_Ali! Let her go." I try to stand, but I fall back to the ground. Ali screams and kicks her feet as he starts to drag her to the door. I reach out and grab the man's leg. He stops and looks down. He starts to laugh._

"_You really think that will stop me?" he kicks my hand away and then slams his foot into my stomach. I instantly curl into myself. The pain pulses through my body as I watch Alison get dragged away. Once he has Alison outside, he closes the door._

_I push the pain to the back of my mind and I pull myself up to the door. I pull on the handle, but the door doesn't budge. I start to cry. But my own sobs do nothing to drown out the sound of Alison's screams from the other room._

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**So what did you guys think? I hope it was worth the wait. PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW! Thanks for reading.**

**-Rin Shade**


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